NJPW “G1 Climax 33 Night Two” results (7/16): Vetter’s review of Tetsuya Naito vs. Jeff Cobb, Tama Tonga vs. Evil, Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Zack Sabre Jr., Shingo Takagi vs. Eddie Kingston, Shane Haste vs. Alex Coughlin

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By Chris Vetter, ProWrestling.net Contributor (@chrisvetter73)

NJPW “G1 Climax 33 Night Two”
July 16, 2023 in Hokkaido, Japan at Hokkaido Prefectural Sports Center
Streamed on New Japan World

The tournament is comprised of 32 wrestlers, spread out in four Blocks, each comprised of eight competitors. This is a round-robin tournament, so each competitor has seven tournament matches. New this year, the top TWO finishers in each Block advance to a single-elimination, 8-man tournament. The winner gets a title shot at Wrestle Kingdom on January 4. Time limits are 20 minutes this year, NOT 30 minutes, so we’ll see how that impacts the tournament. Kevin Kelly and Chris Charlton provided live commentary. The tournament is spread out over 19 shows in a 29-day span.

Once again, the crowd is perhaps in the 2,000 range. This is a large arena, but we can see the upper deck isn’t packed.
 
1) David Finlay (w/Gedo) (2) defeated Tomohiro Ishii (0) in a C Block tournament match at 15:54. They immediately traded stiff forearm shots as Kelly talked about how Finlay’s Bullet Club is “a leaner, meaner group.” Finlay hit a modified Dragonscrew Legwhip at 2:00 and began targeting the left knee. Ishii hit a powerslam and he took control. Ishii hit a Saito Suplex at 6:00. Finlay dropped Ishii throat-first on the top rope, then he hit a Falcon Arrow. Finlay hit a backbreaker over his knee for a nearfall. Ishii hit a flying shoulder tackle and they were both at 8:30. Ishii nailed a second-rope superplex for a nearfall, but he clutched at his sore left knee. He hit a German Suplex.

Finlay fired back with a roaring forearm, a German Suplex, and a dominator faceplant for a believable nearfall at 10:30. They traded more forearm shots. Finlay hit a spear for a believable nearfall. Ishii hit a headbutt that dropped Finlay, then a standing powerbomb for a nearfall. Finlay countered with a Blue Thunder Bomb at 13:00. Ishii hit a diving headbutt and they were both down. He hit a sliding clothesline for a nearfall and he was fired up. Ishii blocked the Trash Panda and he hit an enzuigiri and a clothesline for a nearfall. Finlay hit the Trash Panda/neckbreaker over his knee for the clean pin. A really good match but I see Finlay as the tournament favorite and wasn’t losing here.
 
2) Hirooki Goto (2) defeated Toru Yano (0) in a D Block tournament match at 6:43. Yano has a sports mascot (person inside a costume) with him. Yano got a pair of rollups for nearfalls in the opening seconds; Yano matches can be cartoonish but also can seemingly end of nowhere. They brawled to the floor and did comedy with Irish Whips. Goto and the mascot vanished under the ring. Goto emerged at 3:30 wearing the mascot head for more silliness, but Goto nearly got counted out. Back in the ring, Goto hit a clothesline. Kelly noted their last four meetings, the winner was decided in under four minutes. Yano went for a low blow at 6:00 but Goto blocked it. Goto hit a headbutt and a GTR drop over his knee for the pin. Solid.
 
3) Mikey Nicholls (2) defeated Henare (0) in a C Block tournament match at 13:05. Henare has dropped “Aaron,” but more notably, he’s shaved bald and has facial tattoos around his cheeks and mouth; it reminds me of Umaga. “That’s on his face for life,” Charlton said. An intense lockup to open and Nicholls has a slight height advantage. They went to the floor, where Henare whipped Nicholls into the guardrail at 2:00. In the ring, Henare hit a Samoan Drop, then some closed-fist punches to the gut, some spine kicks and a senton at 4:00. Henare hit a Stomp for a nearfall. Mikey hit some chops; Henare hit a spin kick. (The 5-minute call was 40 seconds late; yes I’m nitpicking.)

Nicholls hit a second-rope tornado DDT for a nearfall at 6:30, then a top-rope superplex. They traded ‘thudding’ headbutts on the mat and Nicholls has a trickle of blood on his forehead. They got ot their feet and traded forearm shots. Nicholls hit a Blue Thunder Bomb for a nearfall at 9:30, and Nicholls face was getting covered on blood. Henare hit another punch to the gut and he applied the Full Nelson (Masterlock), but Nicholls reached the ropes. Nicholls nailed a Death Valley Driver, but he missed a top-rope moonsault, and they were both down at 12:00.

Henare hit a running knee to the chest; he pulled down his kneepad and hit another running knee to the jaw. Nichols flipped Henare and dropped him straight on the top of his head for the pin!  Kelly said “shit!” because I jumped as Henare landed; the move looks scary and dangerous. The Young Lions hopped in the ring to check on Henare; they put an ice pack on his neck and helped him from the ring. Kelly said the move is called “the Master Blaster.” Hopefully this is just good selling, but that was as scary-looking of a finisher as I’ve seen in a while. That was hard-hitting, believable stuff.
 
4) Shane Haste (w/Kosei Fujita) (2) defeated Alex Coughlin (0) in a D Block tournament match at 10:55. I don’t think Fujita accompanied Nicholls to ringside. Charlton chastised an ‘unnamed’ wrestling company that “posts record profits and cuts half their roster,” in reference to Haste. They immediately brawled. Haste hit a dropkick; he went for a dive to the floor, but Alex caught him and suplexed him on the thin mat on the floor at 2:00. Coughlin was in charge as they brawled at ringside. Haste suplexed Coughlin onto the ring apron. In the ring, Coughlin hit a gutwrench suplex for a nearfall at 4:00. Kelly said Henare “is undergoing evaluation in the training room right now.” I don’t doubt that.

Haste hit a back suplex, then a running penalty kick to the chest for a nearfall at 6:30. Coughlin fired back with a German Suplex and a rolling Death Valley Driver for a nearfall, then a short-arm clothesline for a nearfall at 8:30. Coughlin hit a powerbomb for a nearfall; he jumped to his feet and grabbed the ref out of anger. They brawled again to the floor, and Alex threw several chairs into the ring. In the ring, Haste hit a back suplex onto a folded chair! Haste hit a slam for the pin! Bringing in the chairs backfired on Coughlin. “Coughlin just threw it all away!” Charlton said.
 
5) Eddie Kingston (2) defeated Shingo Takagi (0) in a C Block tournament match at 12:52. Kingston carried his NJ Strong title with him. Kelly said Kingston is the typical guy who says “I shouldn’t be here; all my friends are in jail or are dead.” They immediately traded shoulder tackles with neither man going down, then they traded chops, then slaps to the face. Kingston hit a spinning back fist and Takagi fell through the ropes to the floor at 2:30. Kingston followed to the floor and he whipped Shingo into the guardrail. In the ring, Eddie hit Kobashi-style rapidfire chops in the corner, then an Exploder Suplex for a nearfall at 4:30. Shingo fired back with a series of punches that dropped Eddie.

Takagi hit a top-rope superplex for a nearfall at 6:30. They got to their feet and traded knife-edge chops, and Shingo hit a Saito Suplex. Kingston hit an enzuigiri and a back suplex for a nearfall. They traded clotheslines. Kingston hit a half-nelson suplex; Shingo hopped up and hit a decapitating clothesline, and they were both down at 10:00. Shingo hit a Northern Lights Bomb, then the Pumping Bomber clothesline for a believable nearfall. Eddie hit a clothesline but only got a one-count. Eddie nailed a pair of spinning back fists at 12:30, then his own Northern Lights Bomb for the pin!
 
6) Zack Sabre Jr. (w/Kosei Fujita) (2) defeated Hiroshi Tanahashi (0) in a D Block tournament match at 16:10. I am a bit surprised that Sabre and Haste are both in the D Block; NJPW usually does a good job of spreading out the factions so they won’t meet. They immediately traded mat reversals as Kelly told an amusing story about filming scenes for “The Wrestler” that weren’t included in the final cut of the Oscar-nominated film. They traded European Uppercuts at 3:00. Tanahashi tied up Zack on the mat. Zack hit a Dragonscrew Legwhip as Tanahashi was in the ropes at 6:00, and he immediately began targeting the left knee. Sabre playfully kicked at Tanahashi, who was on the mat.

Tanahashi got up; Sabre hit some roundhouse kicks to the chest. Tanahashi hit a flying forearm at 8:00, then a second-rope summersault splash for a nearfall. Sabre applied a mid-ring Octopus; Tanahashi escaped but Sabre hit a basement dropkick on the knee, and they were both down at 10:30. Tanahashi applied a Triangle Choke. Sabre went back to a leglock. Hiroshi hit some Dragonscrew Armwhips; that’s new. Sabre hit another dropkick on the knee at 14:30. Tanahashi hit a Sling Blade clothesline for a nearfall; the 15-minute warning is spot-on. Tanahashi hit a top-rope crossbody block, then a cross-armbreaker. However, Sabre rolled him over and got the pin, with the cross-armbreaker still applied. Good match.
 
7) EVIL (w/Dick Togo) (2) defeated Tama Tonga (w/Jado) (0) in a C Block tournament match at 17:49. EVIL attacked from behind and choked Tama with a shirt. Kelly talked about how the last time we saw Tama, he was decisively beaten by David Finlay and was stretchered out. They brawled on the floor, and EVIL suplexed Tama on the entrance ramp at 2:30. They brawled through the crowd, far, far from the ring. EVIL returned to ringside and he rang the bell at 4:30 and celebrated; the crowd booed him, as the match clearly isn’t over. “What purpose did that serve?” Charlton asked. Tama dove back in before being counted out; the ref refused to make a count. EVIL hit a backbreaker over his knee for a nearfall.

Tama hit a series of bodyslams at 7:00 and was fired up. He nailed his Stinger Splash for a nearfall. EVIL hit a fisherman’s suplex for a nearfall. The ref got bumped; Togo hit Jado and got in the ring and helped EVIL in a beatdown on Tama. EVIL and Togo hit the team Magic Killer swinging slam; the ref woke but Tama kicked out at one at 10:30. EVIL applied a Sharpshooter and Tama screamed in pain but eventually reached the ropes. Tama nailed the Tongan Twist faceplant, and they were both down at 12:30. Tama hit an enzuigiri and a spinebuster, then a frogsplash for a nearfall.

Tama went for Gun Stun but EVIL blocked it, and EVIL hit a hard clothesline, and they were both down at 15:00. Kelly noted we had a time-limit draw yesterday. EVIL hit Darkness Falls powerbomb for a nearfall. EVIL hit a hard clothesline; Tama staggered but didn’t go down. Tama hit his own clothesline and he ripped off his vest. Togo hopped in the ring, but Tama hit a Gun Stun on him. Tama hit a double-arm DDT on EVIL for a believable nearfall at 17:00. He set up for a Jay Driller but EVIL fought free. EVIL avoided a Gun Stun, hit a low blow, then the Everything is Evil uranage for the cheap pin. That wrapped up quickly.
 
8) Jeff Cobb (2) defeated Tetsuya Naito (0) in a D Block tournament match at 14:18. They immediately went to the floor, trading whipping each other into the guardrail. In the ring, Cobb hit an impressive dropkick at 2:30. Cobb set up for a dive, but he did Naito’s ‘tranquilo pose’ in the ring instead. Funny. Cobb took control in the ring, hitting a delayed vertical suplex for a nearfall at 5:00 (clock was spot-on.) Cobb hit Naito’s swinging dropkick. “He’s playing a dangerous game; he’s poking the bear,” Charlton warned Cobb for copying Naito’s signature spots. Naito hit a standing neckbreaker. Naito hit a basement dropkick to the back at 7:00, and he hit his signature swinging dropkick in the corner.

Naito applied a leglock around the head and shoulders. Cobb nailed a second-rope powerbomb, and they were both down at 9:30; Cobb eventually made a cover for a nearfall. Cobb  hit a standing moonsault for another nearfall. Naito hit a second-rope huracanrana, then a tornado DDT. Cobb fired back with the Spin Cycle swinging slam at 11:30 and he was fired up. Naito hit an enzuigiri and the Destino. He set up for a second Destino, but Cobb caught him and hit the Tour of the Islands swinging powerslam, and they were both down at 13:00. Naito barely got up before the ref’s 10-count. Naito got a jackknife cover for a nearfall. Cobb hit a German Suplex but Naito popped up. Cobb hit a headbutt to the chest, then a second Tour of the Islands for the pin! Kelly said that was Cobb’s first-ever victory over Naito.

* Cobb got on the mic. “Who thought I would beat Naito tonight? For all you doubters, all that matters is the United Empire is winning the G1, mainly, me.” He said a phrase in Japanese, and name-checked his UE partners.

Final thoughts: Jeff Cobb was mistreated last year, finishing sixth in his seven-man Block. So, it’s great to see him get this big victory. There were a few awkward spots, but I’ll still give it best match. Ishii-Finlay was a really good opener for second-best, and I’ll go with Kingston-Shingo for third best. I haven’t been on any wrestling websites (didn’t want a hint of finding out what happened on this show, or Impact, which I’ll get to later!) so I don’t know if we have any injury updates on Henare. My reaction to watching the move was the same as when I saw the Omega/Ospreay Tiger Driver spot at Forbidden Door 2; hopefully he is just shook up but I truly wouldn’t be surprised if he can’t go on Wednesday, or other shows, too.

The tournament has an off-day on Monday before returning to action Monday and Tuesday. I want to reiterate that this format is the best G1 system. I really like that wrestlers have a day off to recover and aren’t competing in non-tournament undercard matches. Just a few years ago, when there were 20 wrestlers (10 in each block), the 10 not in tournament action were still in multi-man undercard matches, so they were on every show.

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