WrestlePro Alaska “Back with a Bang” results: “The Acclaimed” Max Caster and Anthony Bowens vs. Orange Cassidy and LSG, Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Jay Lethal, Fallah Bahh vs. Justin Corino, Sonny Kiss vs. Kid Money, Tenille Dashwood vs. Freya the Slaya, Buff Bagwell in a six-man tag match

The show was joined “in progress” (I saw a lineup with two matches featuring local talent that must have already taken place.) This appears to be a large convention center with a crowd of 300 to 400. We do have commentary, but the broadcast team didn’t introduce themselves.

1. Freya the Slaya defeated Tenille Dashwood via DQ (reverse decision) to advance in a women’s tournament at 8:01. Freya is taller and thicker than Tenille. Freya hit a rolling cannonball in the corner and a delayed brainbuster for a nearfall. Suddenly the ref was down; both me and the commentators missed what happened. Freya hit a Hogan legdrop for a visual pinfall. Tenille hit her with a chain wrapped around her fist for the tainted pin. But, a second ref ran in and pointed out that Tenille cheated, so the decision was reversed.

* A “Buff Daddy” video aired with clips of Buff Bagwell from his WCW era. When we returned, Buff Bagwell was at ringside. Several guys I’ve never seen before got in the ring, and it has turned into a six-man tag match. The commentary team had no idea what was going on. What’s worse is we seem to be listening to two commentary teams at the same time.

2. CPA, Bryson Axl, and Bobby Bishop defeated Buff Bagwell and The Mean Street Hooligans at 4:37. Buff is still using a crutch, and he hit guys who fell on the floor near him. CPA hit a Death Valley Driver for the pin. This was ugly; none of these guys looked ready to be in the ring. Everything about it was bad, including the dueling commentary teams. They were clearly having technical issues. The announcers point out that Buff was on the losing team but he never got in the match.

3. AJ Radical defeated Vargas via DQ at 6:24. Vargas appears to be Samoan and looks a lot like Jacob Fatu in height and size of his gut. Radical is a scrawny white kid. As expected, Vargas tossed him around and dominated the action. Radical hit a top-rope elbow drop for a nearfall. Vargas hit a running Bulldog Powerslam for a nearfall, then a chokeslam for a nearfall; that should have been it. Vargas kept beating on Radical while Radical was in the ropes, so the ref disqualified him. Terrible finish.

* The next match was from a different show titled “Rock and Roll Forever.” The lights were down low and the fans were in the shadows. If they did do a few pre-show matches, I guess it is indeed time for this intermission match.

Tony Nese defeated Bobby Wayward at 12:21. Wayward wore a generic black singlet, and at first, I thought it was PJ Hawx from NWA, as he’s young with short, black hair. Good mat wrestling to start and this is already much better than the last two matches. They brawled to the floor, and Nese hit some hard chops against the guardrails. This is a strange match as both are acting quite heelish, and I don’t know who to cheer for.

Wayward tied up Nese on the mat, with Nese showing babyface fire, hitting an enzuigiri at 9:00. Nese hit a top-rope moonsault for a nearfall. Wayward hit a suplex with a bridge for a nearfall. Nese nailed the running knee strike in the corner for a nearfall, then a top-rope 450 splash for the pin. It’s easy to forget that Nese is so talented in high-flying moves because he never did them in his 205 Live run.

* OK, we are back at the live show.

4. Planet Payne Fitness and Performance defeated Danny Maff & Bobcat McDillon to win the tag titles at 10:55. Bobcat is so short and so scrawny; Maff is much taller and thicker and seems annoyed by his partner. The Planet Payne guys wore identical t-shirts from their gym, and they beat up on the small Bobcat. Maff finally got in and hit a rolling cannonball in the corner. Maff hit a burning hammer. However, the heels were able to shove Maff to the floor, cover the beat-up Bobcat, and score the pin.

* Maff took off Bobcat’s head with a clothesline after the loss. He threw the ref to the floor and continued to beat up Bobcat. Maff did as much in a 30-second beat down after the match as he did in 11 minutes during the match.

5. Sonny Kiss defeated Kid Money at 6:30. Sonny ht a headscissors takedown early and did a cartwheel, then hit a hard slap to the face. Kid Money dominated early, Sonny hit a faceplant and his splits legdrop for a believable nearfall. Sonny then hit a spin kick to the face for the pin. Basic match.

6. Fallah Bahh defeated Justin Corino at 7:26. I have said this before, but Fallah has put a significant amount of weight in the past two years; he lost a lot but it is all back and then some, and I fear for his health. He seriously is looking like Yokozuna, including his current ring gear. Justin is a basic scrawny white guy half Fallah’s weight. Justin did some yoga moves to start, trying to convince Fallah not to fight, but he ‘fell’ on Corino’s foot, and Justin screamed in pain. OK this is going to be a comedy match.

Fallah hit some chops. Justin hit a standing moonsault for a nearfall. Fallah hit a running crossbody block. Justin hit a Swanton Bomb for a nearfall. Fallah hit a Samoan Drop, then he dropped all his weight down with a splash for the pin.

* Jay Lethal hopped in the ring and turned heel on the crowd, saying “screw you” to the fans who didn’t stop at his merchandise table and buy stuff from him. “Now I’m pissed off,” he said.

7. Jay Lethal defeated Scotty 2 Hotty at 11:29. S2H took forever to get in the ring as he danced. The bell rang but they kept stalling. Lethal left the ring and teased being counted out. They finally touched at 3:30. S2H slammed Lethal’s head repeatedly into a turnbuckle, and Lethal collapsed in the center of the ring. Lethal got the upper hand, and they brawled to the floor. Lethal got a chain but the ref confiscated it.

They traded punches. Lethal accidentally crotched himself on the middle rope. Scotty hit some atomic drops, and he crotched Lethal around the ring post. Lethal got a rollup with his feet on the ropes to score the pin. This is just stupid. Where is the ref from the first match who overturned the Tenille Dashwood win?

8. “The Acclaimed” Max Caster and Anthony Bowens defeated Orange Cassidy and LSG at 8:18. The Acclaimed wore their tag titles. Once they got in the ring, Caster sang some raps, saying their opponents were losing like Sarah Palin. Bowens found someone in the crowd with a “scissor me, daddy ass” sign and he scissored him. Caster and LSG started, and LSG hit a dropkick. Orange entered and it appeared he was going to scissor Bowens, but Bowens instead put him in a headlock. LSG hit a double blockbuster.

Orange made the hot (casual) tag at 4:00, slowly walked in the ring, and tapped their shins. The Acclaimed again asked him to do scissors, but Orange put his hands in his pockets instead.  In a funny spot I haven’t seen him do before, Orange set up for a top-rope elbow drop but his opponent was three-quarters of the way across the ring, and Orange crashed to the mat well short of his goal.

Orange hit a stunner on Bowens. Caster hit a Death Valley Driver on Orange. LSG hit a springboard move on Caster, and they were all down. Bowens and LSG traded stiff forearm shots. Caster nailed the top-rope elbow drop on LSG to score the pin. All four guys “scissored” in the middle of the ring to send the fans home happy.

Final Thoughts: The main event was short but fun, even if it was obvious before the match that LSG was there to eat the pin.

The Lethal-Scotty match was mostly stalling. The crowd was engaged but there wasn’t much to it. I know wrestling is often inconsistent on rules, but we had two matches on the same show where someone cheated to win, so why did the refs overturn one win, but not the other?

I’m sure the fans in Alaska were thrilled to see stars like Fallah Bahh, Tenille Dashwood and Sonny Kiss, but none of those matches were noteworthy. Sadly, none of the guys I didn’t know made a good impression or stood out. The show was about two hours even.