By John Moore
Impact Wrestling on PopTV
Taped at various locations and times
After the signature, a music video montage played to hype Bound for Glory. It showed all of the wrestlers getting ready for their biggest PPV of the year. The Impact Wrestling intro theme played…
Josh Mathews and Jeremy Borash checked in on commentary. They cut to a Taya Valkyrie and Rosemary music video package. They cut to footage from Border City Wrestling…
1. Rosemary and Allie vs. Sienna and KC Spinelli in Windsor, Ontario, Canada. Rosemary got a full entrance while they did a flash cut past everyone else’s. KC started off against Allie. KC overpowered Allie and tagged in Sienna. Mathews and Borash tried to explain who Spinelli was. Sienna and Spinelli isolated Allie. Allie caught both of her opponents with a crossbody which allowed her to tag in Rosemary. Rosemary caught both women with a top rope cross body block. Rosemary targeted Sienna but Sienna sidestepped which made Rosemary tackle Spinelli.
Rosemary hit Spinelli with a fisherman buster. Sienna held Rosemary’s leg on the top rope to allow Spinelli to toss Rosemary off the ropes. Spinelli followed up with elbows. Spinelli and Rosemary traded methodical offense. The commentators talked about how Rosemary is going to facepaint some fans at Bound For Glory. Sienna tagged in and kept Rosemary away from her tag partner. Sienna locked in a modified tarantula on Sienna. Sienna turned the tide and gave Rosemary a slap in the center of the ring. Sienna hit Rosemary with a Samoan Drop and gloated to the crowd.
Rosemary did her version of the Undertaker sit up and dodged a spinning roundhouse from Sienna. They ended up taking each other out with a roundhouse kick. Mathews reiterated a prior point about Allie looking like an Easter Egg. Allie and Spinelli tagged in and Allie had the hot tag sequence. Spinelli took down Allie with a lariat takedown. Josh Mathews talked about how Allie looks better than usual in the ring. Allie hit Sienna with a codebreaker while Rosemary hit a German Suplex. Allie picked up the win on Sienna.
Allie and Rosemary defeated Sienna and KC Spinelli via pinfall in 6:23.
Allie gave the referee and Rosemary a hug after the match… [C]
John’s Thoughts: While this was no way as offensive as the AAA matches from Irapuato, this match still did little to hype up “Impact’s biggest PPV of the year”. No offense to Spinelli, but who is she and why is she having a match on Impact television and teaming up with the Knockouts champion all of a sudden? I’m glad Josh Mathews tried to cover it, but Allie wasn’t playing her usual pro wrestling rookie character which contradicts with Impact’s universe. This was an ok match and as I said better than the AAA ones, but it still does nothing of value for Impact Wrestling.
Jeremy Borash told us that we were getting a tag team match from Noah where Moose was involved (no identities as to his tag partner and opponents). Borash transitioned to a Moose/Bonnar vs. Mo/Lashley video package. They showed a clip of Stephan Bonnar being interviewed by Ariel Helwani about a potential return to MMA against Mo. Bonnar called American Top Team a bunch of dirtbags. ATT’s Colby Covington talked about how Moose and Bonnar are about to get a world of hurt and retribution. He said they were going to take their souls. Tom Lawlor was interviewed next and he talked about how Lashley and King Mo both have dual sport experience. Lawlor said Moose only knows wrestling while Bonnar is better at MMA. Bonnar talked about not worrying and how he’s going to give Moose and Mo beatings. Bonnar said he’s going to be prepared for the interference and he’s going to kick all of ATT’s asses. Bonnar said he respects King Mo for stepping up to get his ass kicked.
They then showed the King Mo interview from last week where he talked about how bad of a person Moose is. Mo talked about only wanting to defend a place he calls home. Moose talked about how he doesn’t know who King Mo is. Bonnar said he’s the perfect tag partner because he can help Moose with MMA and Moose can help him with wrestling. Dan Lambert talked about how he’s a wrestling fan and how he came to support wrestling and Bobby. Lambert said ATT is going to show Moose what happens when he gets in there with real fighter. Josh Mathews put his bet on King Mo and Lashley to win. They cut to a highlight package from the feud.
John’s Thoughts: The production levels of that video package was good, but I’m getting some mixed messages from it and another detractor is we’ve seen most of this video package repeated over the past several weeks verbatim. Where the mixed messages come are in how the video made Moose out to be the real bad guy.
Lashley made his way to the Impact Zone ring as he was flanked by American Top Team. Lambert grabbed the mic for a promo. He soaked up the boos. He said they are about to expose pro wrestling for the fraud that it is. Lambert said they are about to expose pro wrestlers as a bunch of low life, loudmouth, and low talent fighters who can’t fight their way out of a paper bag. Lambert said ATT is about to put this company out of business. Lambert mocked the fans’ chants and said they just want to show up to appear on TV. Lambert hyped up Mo and Lashley’s BFG match and said that Lashley and Mo are two of the highest ranked MMA fighters in MMA today. Lambert said Moose is also a two-sport athlete but none of those sports is fighting. Lambert said Bonnar made history with a historic fight, but he lost that fight.
Lambert said Bonnar is about to lose another historic fight on Sunday. Lambert talked about how the first historic fight (the Griffin fight) propelled a company (UFC) while this upcoming historic fight is about to take a company down to it’s knees. Lambert called the fans mindless sheep because they cheer and boo on command. Lambert got the “what” treatment. Lambert said the fans will stop coming when pro wrestling is exposed and the next time they come to Universal Studios they are just going to see roller coasters. That ended the Lambert promo. Borash said Lambert has lost his mind…
John’s Thoughts: Funny enough, Lambert’s probably right with that roller coaster line given the current state of [not] TNA. Joking aside, Lambert cut a very passionate promo and this was probably the best heel work done by Lambert and the ATT that didn’t come off as cringeworthy. The heels needed some heat, especially after King Mo cut that strong babyface promo in the video package. The only thing I’m disappointed about these days is the positioning of Bobby Lashley in this company since he should be in a more featured program rather than this side story. It’s also a shame we don’t hear Lashley talk since in 2016 he’s proven that he evolved to a damn near amazing promo.
There was a Joseph Park/Abyss and Grado video package…
2. Moose and Okabayashi vs. Nakajima and Kitamiya from Tokyo, Japan. Okabayashi and Kitamiya ran at each other to start off the match. Borash told us that Kitamiya models himself after Mr. Saito. Nakajima tagged in and so did Moose. Mathews talked about how Nakajima was the former GHC Champion. Nakajima gave Moose a few roundhouse kicks. Moose took down Nakajima with a shoulder tackle and did his Moose dance. Moose hit Nakajima with a dropkick. Moose gave Nakajima a pump kick. Moose gave Kitamiya a dropkick. Moose gave both of his opponents headbutts and corner running lariats.
Moose hit Nakajima with his signature springboard crossbody. Moose gave Kitamiya a hesitation dropkick. Kitamiya dared Moose to slap him and he stood strong. Moose did his Moose punches. Kitamiya roared through it and gave Moose a flurry of punches. Kitamiya was too intense as he ran into the turnbuckle. Okabayashi tagged in and overpowered Kitamiya. Madness ensued as all four men entered the ring. Nakajima hit Moose with a delayed vertical suplex. Kitamiya hit Okabayashi with a spear for the nearfall. Okabayashi and Kitamiya traded a test of strong style. Okabayashi body slammed Kitamiya and hit him with a long reaching splash for the win… [C]
Okabayashi and Moose defeated Kitamiya and Nakajima via pinfall in 7:25.
John’s Thoughts: That was a fun match and the Noah footage seems to be the strongest matches we’re getting from their outside relationships. That said, this still does not build up for their PPV on Sunday nor would it set up their future tapings.
This week’s Pluto TV rewind was a Kurt Angle vs. Sting match. Sting had defeated Kurt Angle for the heavyweight title. They cut to Borash and Mathews at their dark commentary room. Borash hyped up the matches booked for Bound for Glory…
It was time for an LAX cinematic. Konnan and Diamante were having an epic battle at dominoes. Suddenly Eli Drake and Chris Adonis entered the clubhouse area. Drake was scared and said he came prepared so he put on a bandana. Konnan told Diamante to frisk them. Drake yelled “viva la raza” at Diamante and he yelled “woah mama! mama cita!” when she reached down low at him. Diamante told Drake to cough twice. Adonis said he came baring gifts. He somehow pulled a plate of food out of nowhere. Adonis handed LAX some chips and guacamole. He said it was freshly made and he thought they liked that kind of food.
Konnan said “there you go” to Drake and Adonis’ gift as he pushed the chips on the floor. Konnan said the vegan joints, tanning salons, and TRT centers are somewhere else and unless they’re here for some Bon Jovi tickets, what the hell are they doing here? Drake said they’re not living on a prayer. Drake talked about having a mutual problem. Drake brought up how LAX used to have title belts just like he does now. Drake said they are trying to take the title from him too. Drake proposed temporary alliance to make sure their BFG opponents don’t make it to BFG. Drake then was enthusiastic about playing dominos.
I think Drake tried to say mashed potatoes and gravy in Spanish? Konnan clarified that they aren’t striking a long-term deal and this is only one night only since after tonight LAX are coming for the Global title. Konnan and Drake shook hands. Drake was happy and he walked off saying “yeah” and “gracias”. Diamante didn’t like the deal. Konnan talked about how this was something you do in business…
They showed a LAX and OVE highlight package aired where both teams talked about how they were going to win in LAX’s specialty match…
John’s Thoughts: That LAX and Drake/Adonis interaction may have been sadly one of the most entertaining things I’ve seen on this show in weeks. Konnan was his usual smooth self on the mic, Drake was golden, and Adonis made me think of Rhyno eating cheese and crackers when he whipped out the tortilla chips. In some strange way, this has me hopeful that we get an LAX’s surrogate vs. Eli Drake feud down the road just so we can get more interaction between Drake and Konnan. The video package after with OVE’s quotes weren’t bad as well. For once, Ohio Vs. Everything didn’t look like a bunch of goofs. Now if only they didn’t have a tag team name that sounds like a woman’s reproductive parts.
An X Division highlight music video aired with the X Division wrestlers talking about winning the title…
The next match was in the Impact Zone and it’s the exact same match that is advertised for Bound for Glory…
3. Trevor Lee (w/ Andrew Everett and Caleb Konley) vs. Dezmond Xavier vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Petey Williams vs. Matt Sydal vs. Garza Jr. in a non-title match. Dutt brawled with Trevor Lee and his stablemates. Madness ensued in the ring. Garza and Williams worked on each other. Williams hit Garza with a hesitation dropkick to the back. Garza then called for the time out in front of Williams. Williams let him take off his pants. Williams hit Sydal with a suicide dive. Xavier hit Garza with an arm takedown slam. Sydal hit Xavier with a rolling Sobat. Sydal then hit a Scorpion Death drop on Xavier and Garza with a STO. Sydal hit Xavier with a standing moonsault.
Sydal hit Xavier with a basement dropkick in the corner. Dutt and Lee brawled in the ring. Dutt hit Lee with an overhead tiger feint kick. Lee crotched Dutt on the top rope. Sydal caught Lee with a jumping single leg dropkick. [C]
Lee dominated Sydal back from the break. Lee was caught by a Sydal springboard Pele Kick. Dutt came in and hit Lee with a huracanrana. Dutt took out everyone outside with a moonsault. Garza hit a forearm on Dutt. Garza caught a handful of people and powerbombed them. Sydal caught Xavier with a few knees. Williams hit Sydal with the Canadian Destroyer. Xavier broke up the pin. Xavier hit a combo on Williams. Xavier flew outside with a corkscrew Tope con Hilo. Everett and Konley set Dutt up for a Lee powerbomb. Lee was shocked when Dutt kicked out. Xavier came in and hit Lee with an Eddy Gordo Mars attack to pick up the win.
Dezmond Xavier defeated Trevor Lee, Sonjay Dutt, Petey Williams, Matt Sydal, and Garza Jr via pinfall in 7:14 of TV time.
Borash cut to a AAA vs. Impact Wrestling video package…
Gail Kim was shown walking in the backstage area… [C]
John’s Thoughts: That’s new. Usually TNA would give away their PPV match for free a few days after but instead we get the match a few days before the PPV. What I find odd here is if they were going to give away this six-way and they knew it couldn’t they have booked a different match of some sort on Sunday, especially since they are doing a lot of post-production in Nashville?
A Gail Kim retirement highlight package aired where Gail Kim talked about her last Bound For Glory and how she has something to prove. They also included quotes from her opponents. Allie talked about it being a dream come true. Sienna talked about this being different from last year. They showed Allie training with Braxton Sutter. Sienna talked about being the greatest. Allie and Gail made their final cases as to who will be champ…
John’s Thoughts: Eyyy! That was a damn good video package. Now, why can’t we get more of that across the board? They even edited out Taryn Terrell to be more timely.
Gail Kim joined Jeremy Borash in the Impact Zone ring. Borash introduced Gail Kim and talked about making history on Sunday. Borash said Sunday is the 10th anniversary of the Knockouts championship. Borash talked about Kim winning the title in 2007 as the first champion. Gail Kim talked about coming into the company 12 years ago with a dream, to be a part of a women’s division and how that dream came true two years later. Kim said she was fortunate to be the first Knockouts Champion and a pioneer. Borash congratulated Kim on being the first female in the Impact hall of fame. Borash brought up BFG being Gail Kim’s last which drew “no” chants from the fans which caused Gail to chuckle.
Borash brought up the first of Gail’s opponents, Allie. Kim said Allie was a true friend to her and a fellow Canadian. Borash talked about Sienna next. Kim told Sienna that this knockouts division was born then years ago and Kim was bringing back the title back to where it belongs. Borash then closed out the segment…
John’s Thoughts: Simple and effective. Not to mention they were slick for once with editing out Taryn Terrell. Impact needs more simple and effective segments as opposed to contrived clustermesses.
It was time for Global Forge! THE FINALE!!! They showed highlights from the rookies wrestling. The rookies talked about wanting a contract. D’Amore was about to announce the winner. A graphic told the viewers to find out at the Impact website… Johnny Impact was shown chatting with his tag partners for the night OVE… [C]
Borash and Mathews were shown in their commentary room as they talked about being excited for Bound for Glory. They ran through the card again. Mathews said he predicts the Red Wedding match would steal the show (which is the exact same prediction I made on this week’s Dot Net Weekly which was taped before this show). In the graphics, all the belts had a giant “Impact” rectangle slapped on the GFW belts to cover up the “Global Force”…
They showed an Eli Drake and Johnny Impact video package. We’ve seen this one before…
LAX made their full entrance first. Eli Drake and Chris Adonis came out next. Drake wore his red bandana to the ring. Josh Mathews talked about how Eli Drake made an appearance where he unveiled the “Impact Wrestling Pizza”, which I believe is some pizza with corn and siracha on it. OVE barely got to make their entrance before brawling with LAX. Drake and Adonis gave the heels the numbers advantage. Drake decided to hide next to the gorilla position entrance to blindside Johnny Impact. Johnny’s theme played and Drake snuck up behind him with a belt shot. Johnny didn’t get a chance to take off his fur coat. The heels overpowered the babyfaces…Johnny made some separation and hit the heels with a standing corkscrew plancha… [C]
4. Eli Drake, Santana, and Ortiz (w/ Konnan, Diamante, Chris Adonis) vs. Jake Crist, Dave Crist, and Johnny Impact. The match was underway after the break. Johnny kicked Ortiz with a running knee. Dave tagged in. OVE put Ortiz in position for a Johnny thrust kick. Ortiz caught Jake with a powerbomb after Jake tagged in. Borash and Mathews brought up the tattooed man in the OVE vignette. Mathews said he doesn’t think OVE has friends. Borash said they must have friends since Ohio is a big state. The heels isolated Jake in their corner.
John’s Thoughts: Thumbs up to Jake so far for not trying to chart a dumb OVE chant. By the way, the one guy chanting “OVE” in the front row is wearing Jake Crist cosplay. LOL…
Santana hit Jake with a back suplex. Ortiz tagged in and clubbed Jake in the back. Mathews told viewers to get the GWN app to relive this company’s “Rich History”. LAX hit a unique tandem suplex takedown on Jake. Johnny broke up the pin attempt. Jake hit Drake with a jawbreaker. Drake hit an impressive popup flapjack on Jake. Jake caught Drake with a boot. Jake gained a window of opportunity for a tag after a crossbody on Drake. Jake tagged in Johnny Impact. Johnny had a hot tag sequence. He took down Santana with a leg lariat and capoeira legdrop. Ortiz ran in and hit a snap DDT. Madness ensued. Jake hit Ortiz with a flip dive to the outside. Johnny Impact won off a surprise rollup on Santana.
Johnny Impact, Jake Crist, and Dave Crist defeated Santana, Ortiz, and Eli Drake via pinfall in 5:11 of TV Time.
Santana didn’t allow Johnny to celebrate because he immediately hit him with a slicing roundhouse. Chris Adonis pummeled Johnny and brought in Eli Drake. Jake and Dave Crist managed to fend off LAX on the outside. Eli Drake stomped on Johnny Impact’s balls. Santana saved Ortiz with a cannonball on OVE. Drake exposed the turnbuckles in the ring. Chris Adonis brought in a box cutter to the ring. Adonis cut apart the ring skirt to expose the wooden part under the ring foam. Drake made sure to soften up Johnny with belt shots. Eli Drake hit Johnny Impact with the Gravy Train on the exposed wood on in the ring. Eli Drake told Johnny Impact he’s the only one who can hold the championship, not Johnny. Adonis held Johnny who was in pain. Drake laid next to Johnny with a sadistic stare. The show closed with a Bound for Glory commercial. This commercial was so old that they forgot to edit out the Global Force logos…
John’s Thoughts: Well… color me somewhat surprised. That was a pretty good angle that was made relatively better in comparison to all the crap we’ve been getting for weeks. Even if we didn’t get the huge load of crapola shows from all over the place, that was a fun and unique angle to put some heat on Eli Drake both before and after the match. The match wasn’t bad too. The rollup finish worked to give Johnny Impact some momentum without hurting LAX. Double props to Jake Crist for finally not trying to force the crowd to do OVE chants even though their fan cub in the first row tried to no success.
This episode ended strong, but I still have to give the final push to Bound For Glory a failing grade. To their credit, you have to take into account the tough situation they were put in with Jeff Jarrett and the Global Force fiasco; so a part of this awful build is due to circumstance. As much as this build has been bad, as I discussed on Thursday’s member exclusive Dot Net Weekly audio show with Jason Powell, I’m intrigued to see the show since for one they’re having yet another fresh new start and hopefully this non-Dixie Carter company learns from past mistakes. Two, they are actually going to try to put on a good show now that they have creative freedom as opposed to being creatively handcuff due to issues outside of their control. Three, Bye Bye Impact Zone! They are actually going to a wrestling venue where some fans actually paid for tickets and therefore want to watch wrestling.
After it’s all said and done, I’m looking forward to Bound for Glory somewhat. It sucks that main eventers like Lashley, Eddie Edwards, Ethan Carter III and others are bit players on this show. Moose and OVE are made out to be sucky babyfaces. It sucks that they lost so many wrestlers. There seems to be a lot of sucktitude floating around but the one thing they have going for them is a chance to make chicken salad out of a chicken shiz situation. If these bookers can’t do something logical, then I’ll quote Reby Sky in saying “F— that Owl!”. Jason Powell will be buy later today with a Hit List and All Access audio review for the go-home show. Be sure to check out Jason’s live review of Bound For Glory on Sunday night.