8/16 Impact Wrestling TV Results: Moore’s review of Sami Callihan and Dave Crist vs. Tessa Blanchard and Tommy Dreamer, Rob Van Dam, Rich Swann, and Willie Mack vs. The Rascalz, Madison Rayne and Kiera Hogan vs. Jordynne Grace and Alexia Nicole

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By John Moore, ProWrestling.net Staffer (@liljohnm)

Impact Wrestling on Pursuit (simulcast on Twitch TV)
Taped July 19-20 in Windsor, Ontario at St. Clair College

A recap aired of last week’s Impact Wrestling episode…

Josh Mathews and Don Callis were on commentary. Moose made his entrance to start the show…

1. Moose vs. Fallah Bahh. Moose dominated Bahh early on and commented on the cake that he shoved in Bahh’s face last week. Moose tossed Bahh to ringside and the two men brawled at ringside. Moose dominated until Bahh gained control with a back body drop. Bahh tossed Moose inside of the ring after roughing him up a bit. Moose was able to regain control after a chop block on Bahh. Moose then stomped a mudhole in Bahh in the corner. Bahh was bleeding from the nose a bit after Moose dragged his face across the ropes.

Bahh started showing fighting spirit after a few Moose precision strikes. Moose called himself a five star athlete and Bahh a fat piece of garbage. Bahh then Bahh’d up, also leading the crowd with Bahh chants and no sells. Bahh caught one of Moose’s chops and returned with a no no no. Moose responded with a simple shove. Bahh came back and fired up after a Samoan Drop. Bahh rolled over Moose and hit Moose with a Belly to Belly for a two count.

Moose responded to a corner splash with a dropkick to stagger Bahh. Moose hit a Superplex on Bahh and the announcers put over it as a huge thing due to Bahh and Moose’s combined weight. Moose set up for a spear, but he shoulder tackled turnbuckle due to Bahh dodging. Bahh hit Moose with a hip attack in the corner. Bahh went for the Banzai Drop but was tripped of the ropes due to Moose recovering and front kicking the top rope. Moose it Bahh with a spear for the victory.

Moose defeated Fallah Bahh via pinfall in 8:50.

John’s Thoughts: A good match. I’ve said it before, Bahh is deceptively one of the stronger workhorses in Impact. In fact, he’s one of the strongest babyfaces on the roster in that the crowd always care about his matches and root for him. Moose always has good matches due to his athleticism so that’s not surprising. Hopefully this isn’t the end of this feud because it would be fun to have Bahh “overcoming” some force sometime. A bit odd that this was a feud initially started between Moose and Don Callis, but I prefer they not try to get to cute with the meta references.

Tommy Dreamer and Tessa Blanchard were chatting in the locker room. Tessa told Dreamer that she told Dreamer not to help her with OVE last time. Dreamer brought up Tessa being a Blanchard. Dreamer went into the history of Tessa’s grandfather, father, and stepfather. Dreamer talked about how all three saw success once they accepted help from others even though they were initially stubborn.

Dreamer said that Tully Blanchard and Magnum TA reached out to Dreamer to take care of Tessa because Tessa is changing the business. Dreamer said that Tessa is giving people hope. Dreamer said behind every great man there’s a great woman but instead Dreamer wants to stand by the side of Tessa. Dreamer said this isn’t intergender wresting, but rather wrestling. Dreamer yelled at Tessa if Tessa was with him in this fight. Tessa said “I’m with out Tommy” to accept the support… [c]

John’s Thoughts: One downside with Dreamer sometimes is he does get a bit too emotional in all his promos, even in undercard matches (to the point of hyperbole). That said, this was one of Dreamer’s better ones. The historical references were relevant and it did a good job in building up Tessa as a babyface.

A Su Yung vignette aired. Su Yung and the undead bridesmaids were shambling around in a forest area. Su Yung was speaking in what sounded like a Southeast Asian language. They were carrying around a coffin. One bridesmaid was sprinkling roses over a piece of paper that read “Havok”…

John’s Thoughts: They decided to go back to cinematics with this one, but so far no undead realm, so I’m content. This was actually one of Impact’s better cinematics in recent memory due to them not trying too hard. This was solid, and they avoided unexplained supernatural bs. I would honestly not trust Impact to put up a good cinematic every week but if they feel the urge in order ot stand out, then I hope they take effort to write logical cimematics as opposed to doing random stuff.

Josh Mathews and Don Callis checked in on commentary. Josh asked Callis about what we just saw. Callis said he’s worried for Impact due to James Mitchell warning him that Su was dangerous. Josh Mathews noted that next week’s Impact show was the Cali Combat show (taped two weeks ago)…

2. Jordynne Grace and Alexia Nicole vs. Kiera Hogan and Madison Rayne. Both teams scuffled a bit before the bell until Kiera and Alexia paired off. Rayne quickly tagged in so both of them could double team the isolated babyface. Madison hit Alexia with a kick for a two count. Alexia fended off Madison and landed a few armdrags on Rayne followed by a shotgun dropkick. Nicole hit Rayne with a meteora for a two count. Nicole tried to fight off the isolation but Kiera Hogan slammed Nicole by the hair to the mat. [c]

The heels continued to isolate Nicole back from the break with methodical offense and tags for the double team situations. Kiera mocked Grace’s bicep curl after hitting Nicole with a snap suplex. Nicole gained a window of opportunity for the hot tag after hitting Kiera with a body scissors stunner. Grace tagged in and cleaned house. Gracehit Kiera with a twisting body slam while hitting Rayne with a Michinoku Driver. Kiera broke up the pin. Grace hit Kiera with a belly to belly. Nicole tagged in and hit Kiera with a flying crossbody and the pin attempt. The referee told Nicole that Kiera wasn’t the legal woman (nice attention to detail). Rayne took advantage of the confused Nicole and hit her with Cross Rayne for the victory.

Kiera Hogan and Madison Rayne defeated Jordynne Grace and Alexia Nicole via pinfall in 6:17 of TV Time.

Kiera and Madison double teamed Grace after the match by stompping a mudhole in Grace after the match. The lights went out and when they came on Rosemary showed up. Rosemary speared Rayne and tossed Rayne into Kiera. Rosemary hit Kiera with a butterfly suplex to stand tall with her theme playing in the end…

John’s Thoughts: I really liked the finish of the match. The heels got to pick up a win and the referee got to look intelligent for once (in pro wrestling in general) by calling out the babyface for screwing up on not pinning the legal person.

Josh Mathews advertised upcoming Impact live events including the return to Sams Town September 5 and 6, “Operation Override” September 13, “Victory Road” on Impact Plus on September 14. Josh hyped Bound For Glory in Chicago on October 20th…

This week’s Impact Plus Flashback Match of the Week was Chris Sabin vs. Juventud Guerrera in the finals of the Super X Cup on Impact in 2003. They aired 5 minutes and Chris Sabin won…

Ace Austin was shown [possibly acting but] looking depressed. Alisha Edwards walked up to Austin and asked him if he was okay. Austin said he doesn’t feel safe. Alisha asked were the danger came from? Austin said that he’s afraid of Eddie who threatened to kill Austin. Alisha said Austin shouldn’t worry because she and Austin “are just friends” (when did this happen? Did she really get won over by his “d–k in a box”?). Austin agreed and said he’s also concerned about Alisha’s safety. Alisha said Austin doesn’t have to worry because she’ll handle Eddie. After Alisha left, Austin was shown letting out a sly chuckle… [c]

John’s Thoughts: So, this is a bit odd on the side of Alisha and Eddie. Eddie still sucks as a character and when did Alisha all of a sudden become friends with Austin. She wasn’t like this with Moose when Moose was in a similar situation. Impact has done this much better in the past and that was with James Storm trying to steal Mickie James from Nick Aldis (before Impact ruined it by having Mickie get run over by a train).

The last scene continued with Ace Austin acting like he was knocked out on the ground. Alisha went to check on Austin. Eddie Edwards walked in and thought Alisha was making out with Austin. Edwards then went on to ground and pound on Austin. The security guards ran in and managed to pin Eddie to a wall so Alisha Edwards could yell at him (of course). Austin got up and held up his ace card and stuck his tongue out to mock Eddie…

John’s Thoughts: Okay, that was goofy, but logical. I like what they’re doing with Ace Austin and he’s really doing a good job establishing himself as a pest heel.

A Taya Valkyrie cinematic vignette aired. Taya Valkyrie was shown walking around the beach with John E Bravo as her butler(maybe Venice Beach?). Weird 3 stooges like music played during the John E scenes. Taya was shown acting overbearing while forcing John E to take care of her dog…

John’s Thoughts: So. The cinematic was good, but it was killed by that lame stock music they were playing.

Josh Mathews tried to hype upcoming matches but he was interrupted by a brawl happening upside. Michael Elgin and Rhino were brawling in the parking lot. After the guards got in the way, Elgin got the upper hand by slamming Rhino into a truck and standing tall in the end being pulled away by the security…

3. “The Rascalz” Wentz, Trey, and Dez vs. Rob Van Dam, Willie Mack, and Rich Swann. The Rascalz acted in awe at RVD. The two teams took a while to start due to the crowd showering Rob with cheers. RVD took out Trey and Wentz with simple blows. Dez tagged in and knelt over to accept a strike from RVD. RVD tagged in Mack who kicked Dez. Mack kicked Dez and hit Dez with a Koppu Kick to the back of the head.

Swann tagged in. Dez and Swann showed off their agility to each other with getting the upper hand with a dropkick. Mack and Swann dominated Dez. Dez regained control and the Rascalz played isolation after Dez’s CQC onslaught. Wentz tagged in and hit Swann with a Bronco Buster. The Rascalz traded quick tags and quick moves. Trey did a matrix move and hit Swann with a pele kick. More tags and moves ensued. Rich caught Dez and Trey with elbows and took down Wentz with a cutter. RVD took the hot tag and cleaned house. RVD hit his enzuigiri on Trey and Body Slam on Wentz. RVD hit Wentz with a split leg moonsault for a two count.

Mack hit Wentz with his signature Samoan Drop and moonsault combo. RVD followed up with a rolling thunder. Rich hit Wentz with a somersault rolling thunder. Trey shoved RVD off the top rope to prevent him from executing a frog splash on Wentz. Dez held Swann in position for a meteora. More madness ensued with plenty of counters. Rich and Wentz were left trading fatigued strikes in the ring. Rich and Wentz traded strong style strikes. Wentz and Rich had a fun martial arts exchange with Rich coming out on top with a cross kick. This set up RVD for a Five Star Frog Splash which Rich Followed up with a Phoneix Splash on Wentz for the victory.

Rob Van Dam, Willie Mack, and Rich Swann defeated The Rascalz via pinfall in 9:35.

John’s Thoughts: That was a fun trios match that did a good job showcasing a lot of athleticism while also hiding RVD’s weaknesses by only having him in there to do his signature moves. This was a good usage of RVD’s legendary status to help give some rub to a lot of wrestlers.

The show cut to Melissa Santos interviewing Ethan Page and Josh Alexander. Melissa asked The North what was next for them after taking care of LAX. The North then hyped up their matches in California. (Page showed good intensity and ego here)… [c]

The Rascalz, Rich Swann, and Willie Mack were hanging out backstage. Jake Crist walked in and acted like a proud dork (but this time it really worked for him). Jake tried to pick fights with all the wrestlers in the room. Trey bit on the taunt. The segment ended with Jake leaving and Mack calling Trey a “bad kid from Walmart”…

Gama Singh was in the ring and he’s back to cutting one of his usual bored ass promos for the Desi Hit Squad.

4. “The Desi Hit Squad” Rohit Raju and Raj Singh vs. “The Deaners” Cody Deaner and Cousin Jake where the loser has to become the servants of the winners. Cody brawled with Raj while Rohit brawled with Jake. Jake and Cody hit a suplex followed by a running knee on Rohit. Josh Mathews noted that The Deaners invited Josh to a “Glamping” trip.

John’s Thoughts: Funny piece of irony, I’m actually writing this written review while Glamping at a cabin. They have wifi and nice beds at this cabin! Not the usual camping trip of sleeping in sleeping bags in a tent.

Cody threw Rohit on Jake’s knee for a gutbuster. Raj tagged in and the DHS put the boots to Jake. The DHS went for a double suplex on Jake but Jake hit both DHS members with a suplex. [c]

Cody threw Rohit into Raj and hit an impressive reverse facebuster on Rohit. Cody threw Rohit outside. Jake held open the ropes for Cody to hit a suicide dive but Gama tripped Cody. Jake went to pursue Gama which allowed the DHS to double team clubbing blows on Cody. The DHS cut the ring in half on Cody. Gama even laid a cheap shot on Cody while the ref’s back was turned.

Cody almost got a hot tag but Raj pulled Jake off the apron. The DHS then put the boots to Cody in the heel corner. Cody avoided a Shotgun Dropkick from Raj and tossed Rohit aside. Jake got the hot tag and cleaned house. Jake hit Rohit with a back suplex. Jake sent both DHS guys outside with a lariat. Jake then successfully held the ropes open so Cody could hit DHS with a Suicide Dive. Jake then hit the DHS with an impressive top rope hands free dive (he did catch his leg on the top rope, but recovered nicely).

Jake hit Raj with a Michinoku Driver and got a nearfall on Raj. Gama got on the rope to distract the referee. This allowed Rohit to rollup Jake for a two count. Jake clocked Rohit with a right hand. Cody tagged in, tilted his cap, and said it was time to giv’r. Raj hit Jake with a chop block to prevent the Deaners from hitting their finisher on Rohit. The DHS then hit Cody with a double team Spike Flatliner. Jake broke up the subsequent pin.

Rohit hit several impressive strikes and boots on Jake in the corner. Jake caught a flying Rohit who was doing a cannonball. Rohit escaped kicked Jake to the corner and hit Jake with a cannonball. Jake went for a codebreaker but Jake stood tall with his core strength. The Deaners then hit the “Time to Giv’r” (assisted draping pendulum slam) for the pinfall win on Rohit by Cody.

The Deaners defeated the Desi Hit Squad in 11:46 of TV Time. The Desi Hit Squad must now tend to the farm of The Deaners.

John’s Thoughts: Color me impressed. That was a good match that had no business being as good as it was given the cornball presentation of both teams. One of the DHS’s better outings. The Deaners have been surprisingly good and built strong since Cody’s return to Impact. Not looking forward to the upcoming skits between these teams, but kudos for both teams for putting in a strong in-ring effort.

It was time for this week’s OVE camcorder promo. Dave was watching something on his cell phone. He told Sami it was the Impact Flashback Match of the Week. Sami wondered where Madman Fulton was because he wasn’t in the cage. Dave said that Fulton and Jake went to Arby’s to get a beef and cheddar sandwich. Sami said “Jake took our monster to Arby’s?!?”. Dave assured Sami that they went to eat and things are fine. Sami said he and Dave are going to end Tessa Blanchard and Tommy Dreamer tonight. Sami reiterated to Tessa that Tessa will never beat Sami Callihan. Sami ended his promo by saying Thumbs Up Thumbs Down… [c]

The Deaners were shown giving the Desi Hit Squad stereotypical “farm” things like pitchforks, spit buckets, wagon wheels, etc…

Josh Mathews advertised matches for next week’s “Cali Combat” show…

5. “OVE” Sami Callihan and Dave Crist vs. Tessa Blanchard and Tommy Dreamer. Tessa and Tommy went for Bionic Elbows early on but OVE kicked their opponents to stop the move. Dreamer and Blanchard managed to strike both OVE members to send them outside. Tommy hit his signature old-man dive, a lariat from the apron to ringside on OVE. Tessa hit both OVE guys with a somersault. [c]

Tessa and Tommy punched Jake against the barricade. Tommy gave Tessa beer to spit in Dave’s face. Tommy spit water in Sami’s. After getting spat on, Sami entered the ring and was left in there with Tessa. Sami tried to squirm out of the situation with a handshake. Tessa gave Sami a forearm. Tessa slammed Sami in the corner and gave Dave a drop toehold into Sami’s crotchal region. Tessa and Tomy hit Sami with a double lariat.

OVE regained control. Sami gave Tommy a body slam at ringside. Dave gave Tommy a catapult to the bottom rung of the ringside barricade. Dave worked on Dreamer with methodical offense. Sami tagged in and gave Dreamer a kidney punch. Sami and Dave traded quick tags to keep Dreamer away from his tag partner. After a good two minutes or so, Dreamer fended off both OVE members with a boot and forearm. Sami pulled Tessa off the apron to prevent the hot tag (deja vu?).

Dreamer hit both OVE members with a Bionic Elbow and got the hot tag on Tessa. Tessa hit Sami with a cutter. Tessa got both opponents in the corners and ran at them with several corner forearms. Tessa gave Sami a neckbreaker which caused him to DDT Dave. Dave got his boot up to block an incoming Tessa Tessa countered and hit Dave with The Magnum. Sami gave the referee a elbow to the back of the head to prevent the pin. Ref Bump?

Dreamer and Blanchard managed to hit stereo DDTs on OVE. A second referee ran out and Dave kicked out as the legal man. Sami and Dave gave Tessa and Dreamer low blows. Dreamer crumpled, but Tessa stood firm because she doesn’t have balls (creative spot). Sami came in and hit Tessa in the back with a kendo stick because referee 2 was checking up on referee 1. Dreamer got out of the way and Dave accidentally hit Sami. Tessa then hit Dave several times with the stick. Tessa hit Dave with a cane assisted Magnum. The second referee counted the pinfall for Tessa.

Tessa Blanchard and Tommy Dreamer defeated OVE via pinfall in 10:19 of TV Time.

Dreamer and Blanchard celebrated their win to close the show…

John’s Thoughts: A feel-good main event that left the crowd leaving happy while also forwarding this strong Tessa Blanchard vs. Sami callihan long-term story they’re telling. Right now, it’s a bit obvious that they’re building towards Sami picking up the title (Where in the world is Brian Cage anyway? They always have the option of stripping him of the title since he rarely appears on Impact as champion), and Tessa beating Sami to become world champion. It’s not a bad thing that it’s predictable as long as the story is told well, and this one has been told solidly. By the way, bonus points for the comical attention to detail by saying that Jake Crist and Madman Fulton were distracted by Beef and Cheddar sandwiches, which is why they weren’t at ringside.

After one of the less-impressive episodes of Impact, Impact went back to being a good show top to bottom. A shame people aren’t watching this show live because they’re missing out on some solid and satisfying storytelling. You get one of those eh shows like last week, but that’s a case with any series sometimes.

Peak Twitch Viewership: about 5,000 

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