5/3 Impact Wrestling TV Results: Moore’s review of Rob Van Dam’s return, Michael Elgin’s first appearance, Fenix vs. Eddie Edwards, Rosemary vs. Kiera Hogan, Ace Austin vs. Petey Williams

By John Moore, ProWrestling.net Staffer (@liljohnm)

Impact Wrestling on Pursuit (simulcast on Twitch TV)
Taped March 29, 2019 in Toronto, Ontario, Canada at the Rebel Entertainment Complex

A music video recap package aired showing the highlight’s of the Impact Wrestling Rebellion PPV…

The Impact Wrestling intro theme aired (which included edits to include the newer wrestlers on the roster and the new champions that were a result of the Impact Rebellion show)…

Josh Mathews and Don Callis were on commentary. Josh Mathews welcomed viewers to the Rebel Entertainment Complex…

Michael Elgin made his entrance to start the show. Josh Mathews noted that Elgin was a “trending topic” on Sunday. Elgin came out to an Alternative Rock theme (though it may be considered as buttrock to some I would expect, I actually like the sound of this theme). Elgin said it has been a time honored tradition where a new Champion comes to celebrate with the fans, but Cage isn’t here. Elgin said he made sure Cage couldn’t celebrate with the fans and instead Cage is in a hospital. Elgin said the only thing worse than Cage as champ, is that the Canadian fans supported him. This drew some boos. Elgin said “us” Canadians are supposed to stick together, which drew cheers.

Elgin said fellow Canadians are supposed to support great Canadian athletes like Wayne Gretsky, Big Mike, GSP, or Michael Elgin. Elgin said that when Brian sits at home remembering what Elgin did to him he has to realize that Elgin came to Impact Wrestling from Japan to become World Heavyweight Champion and that Elgin is he only person around here who deserves the next title shot. Suddenly, Johnny Impact made his entrance wearing all white. Don Callis noted that Johnny looks naked without his title belt. Johnny said this was deja vu where he breaks one machine and suddenly a new meathead with a little brain shows up and doesn’t understand how things work around here.

Johnny said you can’t just walk in here from the hairclub for men and be number one contender. Elgin stopped Johnny. Elgin said he agrees that he’s losing his hair while Johnny has luscious locks. Elgin said that Elgin is lucky because he still has his testicles while Johnny’s are hidden in Taya Valkyrie’s purse. This drew ohhhhh’s from the crowd. Johnny said it’s a bit odd that Elgin is looking at purses backstage, but Elgin didn’t realize that the purse was Versace, a luxury brand name. Johnny said Elgin wouldn’t know what luxury was like because he came out here spending no more than $49.95 on Highspots gear.

John’s Thoughts: The delivery so far is fine, but this slight interlude into a fashion discussion is getting a bit awks.

Johnny said Elgin has it all wrong because Johnny was the one who actually sent Cage to the hospital and Elgin just delayed an ambulance ride (Johnny is actually right on that one given the injury came from the Spanish Fly spot). Elgin said Johnny doesn’t have a good memory because Cage was standing tall and left after the Elgin Bomb. Johnny told Elgin not to act all proud because wrestling already had one Barry Horowitz and we all know how his career ended up. Johnny said if Elgin watches as much wrestling as Elgin claims then Elgin should know that there is a rematch clause around here. Johnny said that as former world champion Johnny is entitled for a rematch.

Suddenly the LAX gunshots played as Konnan made his entrance to LAX’s entrance theme. Konnan said that when they were talking about hair and looking into each other’s eyes Konnan almost thought they were about ot kiss (not the way I would have said it but Konnan also agreed that the fashion discussion was awkward). Konnan said he’ll let them talk fashion in the back. Konnan said that LAX and Lucha Bros. are family again therefore Konnan’s back to being Pentagon’s representative. Konnan said that if anyone has a real claim to the world champion, it’s Penta. Johnny said that Penta was only champion for a few days and Johnny has played longer games of Mario Kart than Pentagon’s title reign. Konnan said it was short, just like “Johnny Boone the Bounty Hunter’s” movie career.

Konnan said it was time to get back to business and think of the title shot priority chronologically: Elgin’s three, Johnny’s two, and Pentagon is number one. Callis said the logic makes sense. Elgin said that Konnan and Johnny like to do a lot of talking but Elgin is a man of action. Elgin said that he has a message for Konnan to take back to Pentagon. Elgin grabbed Konnan by the collar and Pentagon ran out for the save. Pentagon and Elgin brawled while Johnny put his hands in the air and kept out their business. The Indie Wrestler security guards ran out to separate Pentagon and Elgin. Johnny snuck in a sucker punch to Elgin and then bailed up the ramp. The crowd chanted “Cero Miedo”. Callis said the big news here is that Pentagon is back in the title hunt. The security separate all the players in the situation. Elgin tossed around the indie security and gave one a Gorilla Press on a pile of indie security. Elgin’s music played to close the segment… [c]

John’s Thoughts: Yes, Konnan can be a bit vulgar sometimes but I agree with him that Konnan was needed to get this segment back on track while Johnny and Elgin got lost in talking about hair. Moving on from that, this was a solid segment to set up the main event title scene while Cage is out due to injury (which was also reported to extend through the next set of tapings). My favorite piece of business here is it looks like Impact might be going with Pentagon as a singles wrestler again? If so then hell to the yes! Even a bigger bonus is Konnan cutting the English promos. Here’s hoping that Konnan goes back to ripping into bad characters while Pentagon calls everybody Putas (bitches) and Cabrons (dumbasses).

An ad aired for the new Impact Plus streaming service…

Josh Mathews and Don Callis checked in from ringside. Josh announced Johnny Impact vs. Michael Elgin vs. Pentagon Jr. in a number one contenders triple threat as the main event of this episode. Josh talked about how Brian Cage got injured after Johnny Impact’s Spanish Fly. Callis said that Cage has talked about losing feeling in both of his legs after that spot but he gutted out a victory. Callis noted that Cage’s sweet victory was taken away from him by Michael Elgin and Elgin’s Elgin Bomb. Josh said he hopes for a speedy recovery for Cage. Josh announced more matches and Rob Van Dam’s return to Impact. Josh then plugged the Code Red show which will be exclusive to Impact Plus…

Ace Austin made his entrance. He pulled out his ace card and swung around his Gambit stick. His opponent was Impact’s Captain Canada, Petey Williams, who came out wearing the canadian Flag. The crowd sung the lyrics of “Oh Canada” even after Petey’s Oh Canada theme stopped…

1. Ace Austin vs. Petey Williams. Side note, I accidentally typed in Ace Austin vs. Oh Canada before correcting myself. Austin called for a Code of Honor handshake which Petey accepted. Austin used the handshake to initiate a headlock on Petey. Petey hit a hesitation dropkick to the back of Austin. Petey took down Austin with one of his signature huracanranas followed by a Suicide Dive to the outside. Callis said that Petey is a different and more inspired person when they go to Canada, but Callis wondered why he doesn’t become that guy when they go to other places (good point).

Ace Austin managed to turn the tide on Petey by hitting Petey with a suicide dive. Austin showed some great balance on the apron when Petey tried to trip him up. Petey tripped Austin on the top rope and put him in the Tree of Woe. Petey tried to do his signature rendition of “Oh Canada” on his opponent but Austin used his core strength to slam Petey with a Super German Suplex and slicing roundhouse. Don Callis wondered why Petey needs to put his foot on people’s crotches to sing the National Anthem (another good point)? Callis then asked Josh if Josh knew what the national animal for Canada is? Josh said he thinks it’s a Moose? Callis said it was the beaver (oh my god!). Callis then asked Josh “Do you like Beavers?”.

John’s Thoughts: It’s quotes like that why Callis is such a great color commentator.

Ace Austin did his signature paper cut to Petey Williams. Josh and Callis then talked about how bad paper cuts were, especially in the finger webbing. Petey blocked two dives from Austin. Petey kicked Austin and then rallied at him with punches. Petey hit Austin with a release German followed up by a Side Russian legsweep. Austin came back with a side slam and basement roundhouse. Austin got a two count. Petey gave Austin a powerbomb. Austin came back with a modified Final Cut Suplex for a two count. Petey countered Austin into a sharpshooter.

Austin grounded Petey with a springboard Fame-asser for a nearfall. Petey hit Austin with a pop up Flatliner. After some exchanges Petey was staggered on the top rope. Austin hit Petey with a unique slingshot Frankenstiner. Ace Austin then hit Petey Williams with “The Fold” (Running Blockbuster) for the pinfall victory.

Ace Austin defeated Petey Williams via pinfall in 7:21.

Josh Mathews wondered if this victory put Ace Austin in line for an X Division Title Shot. Josh then went on to point out that Ace Austin will be wrestling for the X Division Championship at Code Red in a multi man match…

John’s Thoughts: A solid match that felt like it ended a bit abruptly before it kicked into third gear. While the crowd was behind Petey, it seemed a bit isolated to Petey appealing to their nationalism with the spots that were esoteric towards Canada like the anthem or Sharpshooter. I do like that Austin got a definitive clean win over Petey as it gives him some credibility but the rushed nature of this program detracts from that a bit. Again, here’s hoping that Impact finds a way to make Ace Austin mean more than an Ace card and Gambit cosplay.

Rosemary was shown roaming around in a rose tinted boiler room area. She was dragging around Undead Maid of Honor (KC Spinelli I think?) around with a chain wrapped around UDMOH’s neck. Rosemary told UDMOH, “One toy stolen, and tonight the firefly goes out!”…[c]

It was time for a Sami Callihan and OVE camcorder promo. Sami wondered why Dave was dressed up as a dork. Dave said he was “Wild Thing” from the movie Major League. Sami approved. Madman Fulton was standing behind the Crist Brothers while Jake went back to doing his mime routine of Sami, which annoyed Sami for a bit. Sami said he was laying a challenge. He said his feud with his family, Rich Swann, ran it’s course. Sami then claimed that Impact Management was screwing him over by banning his other family Jake, Dave, and Fulton from ringside. Sami said that was bullcrap. Sami said if Rich Swann wants to continue running around as a bastard with no family then he’s challenging Rich Swann to an eight person OVE Rules match between OVE and whatever team Rich Swann can come up with. Sami and OVE said OVE is for Ohio! By Ohio! and will take over Everything… Everything… EVERYTHING!!!

Rosemary made her entrance dragging a chained UDMOH with her. Rosemary slapped around UDMOH to pose with her. Rosemary’s opponent was Kiera Hogan…

John’s Thoughts: Uhm? This is a bit odd, but I’m guessing this appeals to the Impact fans that are into that kinky stuff?

2. Rosemary (w/Chained UDMOH) vs. Kiera Hogan. Josh was shocked that Rosemary chained UDMOH to the ringpost. Callis said he didn’t know that Impact was a pet friendly workplace. Callis said he’s going to bring a dog and kitty. Kiera went at the larger Rosemary with punches. Kiera was on fire with splashes and a basement dropkick in the corner. Rosemary fought out of the corner with a boot but Kiera came back with a huracanrana. Callis said it’s a bit surprising that Kiera is dominating Rosemary. Josh talked about how Kiera and Rosemary tried to save their “lost friend” (Allie) from the Undead Realm.

Rosemary recovered and turned the tables on Kiera with a sidewalk slam. Rosemary followed up with ground and pound. Kiera tripped up Rosemary by dropkicking Rosemary’s knee. Rosemary no sold a few kicks a la Undertaker, but Kiera’s third kick grounded Rosemary. The camera showed UDMOH struggling. Don Callis said somebody needs to get UDMOH a bowl of water or something.

Rosemary locked Kiera in The Tarantula. Kiera came back at Rosemary with a shotgun dropkick to send Rosemary to the ring level ramp. Rosemary shoved Kiera away with her feet to send Kiera falling off the stage. Rosemary was pleased at this but suddenly Su Yung’s entrance music played. Rosemary rolled her eyes as to connotate the words “oh no not again?” (that is my exact reaction to most Undead Realm segments). The Undead Bridesmaids ran out and attacked Rosemary to prompt the DQ.

Rosemary defeated Kiera Hogan via an apparent DQ in 4:27.

Su Yung walked out and held out her hand like she was “possessing” her servants. Su Yung then unleashed UDMOH. The undead bridesmaids attacked Rosemary with the world’s weakest looking punches. The punches looked so weak, Don Callis called them out on it and tried to explain that the punches were weak because “these women are in an altered state”. Kiera teased entering the ring to save Roesmary. Kiera had second thoughts as she backtracked up the ramp with a bit of a smirk on her face. This drew boos from a few fans. UDMOH gave Rosemary a straitjacket neckbreaker. Su Yung hit Rosemary with Panic Switch to end the segment posing with the Undead Bridesmaids… [c]

John’s Thoughts: I mean, if I were Kiera Hogan, I would walk away from the Undead Realm division too. Say no to the Undead Realm! Make that a T-shirt. Anyway, the match was okay, but it’s still really tough to get behind Impact stubbornly continuing with the dead Undead Realm program that is holding a good portion of their roster captive. I know this isn’t over, but I hope we see Kiera escape this soon because she has so much potential as Impact’s flagship plucky babyface.

Melissa Santos interviewed Taya Valkyrie about being the first person to defeat Jordynne Grace. Taya bragged and said “duh” like it was a forgone conclusion. Taya said she beat every single person Impact put in front of her. Madison Rayne interrupted Taya’s gloating. Madison Rayne noted that she’s 2-0 against Taya (yep, they pushed her as “Super Madison” right before she left for Ring of Honor and she picked up the flukey win a few weeks ago). Madison said that logically makes her number one contender. Madison wanted the match tonight. Taya said Madison can’t get a title shot because Taya has to wrestle at Code Red on sunday. Taya said Madison will get a match someday but it won’t be the match that Madison wants. Taya told Melissa to follow her to close the segment. Josh wondered why Taya was taking Melissa Santos with her???

Josh Mathews sent things to the newly retitled “Impact Plus Flashback Match of the Week”. It was Rob Van Dam vs. Rhyno in a first blood match from TNA Final Resolution 2010. They aired about five minutes. Rhyno bled. RVD won…

Melissa Santos was shown holding a microphone against the “Impact Management” office. Taya could be heard ranting. Taya threatened to get lawyers involved. Taya walked out pleased and said her contract says she only has to defend her title every 30 days. Taya said she was giving Madison Rayne a match next week, except it’ll be non-title… [c]

John’s Thoughts: A small, and nice attention to detail. One of the (many) flaws of WWE Raw is that they would throw out non-title match defeats all over the place, have the challenger win a non-title match, then have the champion retain at the PPV. It’s become a mundane formula. I like Taya using the pro wrestling 30-day clause as a way to draw heat. Old TNA would never had paid attention to this small detail so I like that the current Impact creative structure is paying attention to detail because it respects (as opposed to insult) the viewer’s intelligence.

After the break, Impact cut to an LAX clubhouse skit. Ortiz was sipping out of a flask and a bottle of Blanco Patron and not knowing which one was better. Santana was counting dat chedda. All is well in LAX’s world. Konnan walked in and sung in Spanish to celebrate with LAX. Konnan talked about how things are going well, including with Pentagon. Konnan said that Pentagon can bring the World title to the family. Konnan also said that LAX might also be overpartying because they have a title defense at the Code Red show. Konnan took away Ortiz’s brown flask and Patron. Konnan also said that “The North” are in line for a title shot. Oritz said to trust them and that LAX always take care of business.

Ortiz said that the Rascalz invited LAX to “The Treehouse”. Konnan said he likes that place. Konnan took away Santana’s money and left him one bill. Konnan said that LAX needs to train for their upcoming matches. Konnan walked away. Ortiz was giddy over Konnan forgetting to take the Patron Blanco bottle. Konnan came back and took away Ortiz’s bottle to leave Ortiz comically disappointed. Ortiz said the bill was counterfeit. Ortiz jacked Santana’s bill and said he was going to buy more alcohol. Santana looked at the camera with a TV drama style shrug…

John’s Thoughts: Simple and effective cinematic work (without a cinematic cam). They didn’t really break new ground here but these LAX clubhouse skits are really good at character-building LAX as well as reinforcing their presence on TV. Part of what makes these segments so fun to watch these days are the stellar promo and character work by Santana and even better character work by his brother in crime Ortiz.

Eddie Edwards made his entrance and he’s still crazy. The ring announcer announced “Kenny” as a person. His opponent was Fenix. Fenix came out wearing his pre-match Samurai themed garb. Josh Mathews noted that Fenix sometimes gets overlooked because he’s Pentagon’s little brother. Callis agreed and said that Fenix is a better athlete than Pentagon while Pentagon is just more well rounded (Hey? I’ve been arguing his point for over a year and they’re finally getting to it!)…

John’s Thoughts: Crazy Eddie doesn’t do much for me. Again, the big news for me here is Rey Fenix is back to being a singles wrestler! Again, I know that there’s a looming possibility that Fenix and Penta get locked up by AEW, but for now Impact should get the most out of them. Fenix has the potential to be a face of the company but his immense talents usually get hidden in front of his highly charismatic brother. Don Callis seems very aware of Fenix’s abilities because he echoed my thoughts on Fenix that I’ve been pushing for almost a year.

3. “Crazy” Eddie Edwards (w/Kenny… yes, “he” got a ring announcement) vs. Fenix. Eddie kissed his stick before the match. A “both these guys” chant ensued. Eddie asked for and got a Code of Honor handshake with Fenix. Eddie called Fenix an amigo. Eddie started the match off with a bearhug. Don Callis noted that Eddie Edwards is a former world champion both in Impact and Pro Wrestling Noah. Fenix countered Eddie and locked him in a butterfly stretch. Eddie countered with a lateral press. Fenix and Eddie separated for a stalemate reset. Eddie and Fenix then had a Test of Strength.

Fenix used a Tiger Feint Kick to block an Irish Whip. Fenix then flipped all over the place to elude Eddie’s offense. Eddie then brought “Kenny” in the ring. The referee confinced Eddie to put down his stick. Fenix hit Eddie with a Pele Kick. Eddie blocked Fenix’s rolling cutter by pointing a stick in his face. The referee then got Eddie to put the stick down and Fenix followed Eddie up with a dropkick. Eddie outsmarted Fenix’s Tiger Feint technique by dropkicking him outside with a shotgun dropkick.

Suddenly, Killer Kross stood frozen on the top of the stage with his arms crossed. The blue light gave him an ominous aura. Callis said that Kross’s gaze looked vacant. Eddie seemed a bit distracted while he was working over Fenix while the camera also showed Kross in his statue-like pose. Fenix grounded Eddie with a crucifix bomb. Edwards planted Fenix with a Blue Thunder Bomb for the nearfall. This got a smirk and eyebrow raise out of Kross (Kross is so good at subtle body language).

Edwards and Fenix traded Japanese Strong Style chops. Fenix finally landed the rolling cutter on Edwards. Edwards countered with a flapjack and forearm. Eddie Edwards planted Fenix with a Tiger Driver for a two count. Callis noted that Eddie didn’t hook the legs. Josh noted that Kross was appraoching ringside. Kross picked up the Kendo Stick and teased giving it to Eddie. Kross didn’t and instead pulled it away from Eddie with force. Fenix took advantage of a distracted Edwards by nailing him with a back cross kick and slicing Sobat. Fenix hit Edwards with a Spinning Kinniku Driver for the victory.

Fenix defeated Eddie Edwards via pinfall in 8:03.

Kross was swinging the Kendo Stick and was cracking up at the top of the stage. Kross left with the kendo stick. Eddie Edwards then paced around the ring in a craze because Kross took away “Kenny”…

John’s Thoughts: Fenix vs. Eddie Edwards would be a main event in any promotion. That said, this wasn’t balls to the wall, but not all matches have to be balls to the wall. I like that they held back from going crazy or flippy floppy. The methodical build worked and they should save Fenix’s best for main event or PPV situations. As bad as Crazy Eddie has been, I’m looking forward to his presumed feud with Kross because Kross is just so good in his role as a catalyst and instigator. Kross was a star in this segment with amazing subtle body language. By the way, can Kross take Kenny to a bonfire and use Kenny as fire wood? Do this for all of us Kross…

RVD was shown walking the hallways as Josh Mathews noted that RVD is a former Impact World Champion… [c]

Tommy Dreamer met with Rich Swann backstage. Swann was wearing a nice dress shirt and he’s still clean shaven. Tommy Dreamer offered his services to help Swann in his eight person tag match. Swann thanked Dreamer for the help and said that Mack makes their tream a trio. Swann said they need one more person. The smoke show appeared, complete with smoke. Scarlett Bordeaux said that Swann and Dreamer needs a person to join their foursome. Dreamer sounded nervous and said “I did the first three way dance” (that was great!). Swann professionally complemented Scarlett while Dreamer was eyeing up Scarlett top to bottom saying that “she’s hot!”. Swann said he doesn’t want to bring Scarlett into Sami’s violence. Scarlett said she wasn’t offering herself because she was thinking of something “Bigger”. “no no no” could be heard as Fallah Bahh completed Rich Swann’s quartet…

John’s Thoughts: I have to say. I really like that Rich Swann has seemingly evolved all aspects of his character. Not only did he get a really nice shave and haircut, but he dropped the goggles, dresses professionally backstage, and acts a bit more seriously. This is how you do character progression. Good job to Swann and whoever is working with Swann for this positive character evolution. It was also fun to see Tommy Dreamer go into the comedy character that he plays on WWE Network’s Edge and Christian show. They joked on the WWE Network that Dreamer has found a strange way to work for both Impact and WWE at the same time (as well as every other indie promotion because Dreamer is everywhere).

Rob Van Dam’s crappy, but hilariously crappy music, played (tbh, RVD’s crap ass theme music is actually a guilty pleasure to me. In the same way that I get a huge laugh out of Shane McMahon’s crap ass punches). RVD entered the ring and soaked up ROb Van Dam chants. RVD talked about he probably should be talking about all the great dream matches she could be having now that he’s in Impact. RVD said he doesn’t have to recite that because the fans already because already know that RVD can have good matches with anyone. RVD said he’s here because of “who I am”. RVD talked about how he sees his influence on today’s stars. RVD then went into his rant about people stealing his moves. RVD said it’s a bit flattering but these guys are in a state of mind of competition. RVD said he’s here to show them the difference of imitating their hero on TV and the whole F’n Show Rob Van Dam.

RVD’s promo was interrupted by All Ego Ethan Page who came out to The North’s entrance theme. Ethan Page brought two chairs to the ring. Page said that these chairs are probably getting RVD excited. Page said he’s going to show RVD a new way to use chairs. Page set them up to sit down on. The crowd cheered this as Page sit down and smiled. Page said he’s here to chat with RVD. RVD told Page “Who are you?” which drew boos from the crowd. The crowd gave “All Ego” a loud ovation. Page called the cheering fans idiots and said his real name is Ethan Page. Page then said that if RVD isn’t going to sit down then he’s going to just use the chair as a leg rest. This drew laughs from the crowd. RVD took the chair away and sat on the spine of the chair.

Page said that RVD thinks of himself as the lockerroom hero and that everyone steals his moves. Page said that RVD is no hero to Ethan Page and Page never looked up to RVD. RVD joked that since Page is sitting at an angle, he’s literally looking up (nice joke). Page said it’s clear that RVD never watched an Ethan Page match. RVD said “nope”. Page said he never stole RVD’s signature moves. RVD folded the chair up. RVD said he knows what’s going on here. RVD said he gets that Page grew up wanting to meet RVD. RVD said he can just kick Page’s ass right now. Page said RVD seems a bit agitated and he needs to take some of his medicine (THC). Callis said he wants some of that medicine. Page said that they can have a match next week. RVD tossed the chair at Page’s head and hit him with the Van Daminator (Rolling Sobat into a steel chair). RVD left to his crappy entrance music… [c]

John’s Thoughts: RVD was very awkward here because of this weird tirade he’s going on about people stealing his moves. I think they want him to be babyface given the directive that Ethan Page was set out to do by turning the fans against him. That negative half aside, ETHAN PAGE WAS REALLY GOOD! This was definitely his best night promo-wise on Impact and he did a superb job carrying stoned RVD through what became a pretty entertaining segment once he got involved. He was so good that the crowd was cheering him and bonus points to him for being cognizant of that and turning the crowd against him. If they want, Ethan Page can slide into the role of Eli Drake with main event promo potential.

During the commercial, Melissa Santos was talking to Twitch Viewers about how she was really impressed by Ethan Page’s talking ability. Melissa was doing this live skype session from the 2300 Arena tapings. In a unexpected surprise moment, The Disco Inferno Glenn Gilbertti walked next to Melissa and started to chat with her. Disco told the audience that the ECW fans are the worst fans he’s ever been in front of. He talked about how at the tapings he went out there and they disagreed with and booed his views on women that women shouldn’t be wrestling in the ring.

Melissa asked Disco if women make Disco uncomfortable. Disco said “I like women!”. Melissa decided to test Disco and asked him if he actually watches Impact and to name off some of the current Knockouts. Disco struggled a bit and said he knows Gail Kim. Melissa called out Disco about how he knew Gail from a long time ago. Disco then said he knew Tessa Blanchard and thinks she’s good. Suddenly Taya Valkyrie shoved Disco out of the way to chat with Melissa. Melissa told Taya to go away because she’s texting her Fiance who’s in a hospital bed. Taya gloated about how Johnny put “Melissa’s Fiance” in the hospital bed. Taya left and suddenly Matt Striker showed up. Striker talked about how he’s used to hanging out with Vampiro and how Melissa is an upgrade because Melissa’s a chick. Melissa talked about how the last few minutes was crazy with so many people showing up. Melissa then sent things back to the actual Impact show…

John’s Thoughts: I usually don’t recap these Melissa Santos and Don Callis skype calls, but this one had a lot of meaningful content in it. The most pleasant surprise from that segment is we now know that Disco decided to leave his nest of Las Vegas for a week and work with Impact Wrestling at the ECW arena. I hope they end up doing some cinematic work with him because his cinematics were a highlight of the Sam’s Town Casino tapings and a good contrast to the horrible Undead Realm cinematics. Does Matt Striker showing up mean he’s doing something with Impact? As good as Striker is, I hope they don’t move Callis away because Callis is one of the best commentators in all of Wrestling. Is Callis at a New Japan show or something?

Back from the actual break, Josh Alexander yelled at Ethan Page for being irrational. Page said he got the North a high profile match against RVD. Alexander said it’s not the North that got a match because Page got Ethan Page a match against RVD. Alexander said they were scheduled to face LAX and Page messed that up by challenging RVD. Page said this is a good thing because Alexander coming along lit a fire under Page. Moose walked in wearing a nice, and probably Chinese themed, suit. Moose said “hey, my Canadian friends!”. He said there shouldn’t be fighting around here. Page talked about how he’s willing to do double duty against LAX and Rob Van Dam. Moose said that doesn’t have to happen because Page can face RVD while Moose teams with Alexander against LAX. Moose said after they all win they can go to the real LAX (Los Angeles International Airport). Moose said Los Angeles is fun (I agree with this). Alexander walked away dismissively saying “Good Luck All Ego”…

John’s Thoughts: I think this is the first episode of Impact where we saw All Ego’s Ego. That was a good segment in getting across Page’s ego and confidence for the first time since he was introduced as “All Ego”. Heel Moose continues to astonish me because the guy was the worst babyface in pro wrestling and now he’s one of the most entertaining wrestlers in all of pro wrestling. I know I repeat that point a lot but this is such a drastic change. The guy usually ended every segment he was in with his hand on his balls because the heel would kick him there.

A very good Gail Kim video package aired with Gail Kim putting over Tessa Blanchard’s ability after their encounter at Rebellion. Gail sold this as a passing of the torch moment and talked about how her retirement match felt a bit empty before and this was more fulfilling…

John’s Thoughts: A good package, but Gail was right. This was a more proper send off (if it is a sendoff?) for Gail because the last one was borderline disrespectful to such a legend in Women’s wrestling. If you remember correctly, that PPV had Gail Kim pick up the belt. Not Impact’s fault, but they were running low on PPV time. They were forced due to time constraints to dismiss Gail Kim’s post-match celebration and rush to the main event…

From last Sunday, Tessa Blanchard was shown crying in the arms of her father, Tully Blanchard. Tully told Tessa that he’s so proud of Tessa. Tully told Tessa to go get something to eat. Tully was then interviewed. Tully talked about how seeing his offspring against Gail Kim reminds Tully of his own battles against people like Wahoo McDaniel or Dusty Rhodes. Tully said he had the tar beaten out of him those days. Tully talked about how the ladies gave everything they had just like those legends. Tully said it was just magnificant to watch. Tully said that he could tell that Gail Kim and Tessa respect each other like he did with is contemporaries back in the day… [c]

John’s Thoughts: A nice and wholesome segment. Was this and Sunday’s post-match a Tessa face turn?

Josh Mathews and Don Callis checked in on commentary. Callis said he’s on Impact Plus looking for Scott D’Amore matches. Josh ran through some upcoming events including Code Red. Josh announced OVE, Callihan, and Fulton vs. Swann, Bahh, Dreamer, and Mack, Moose and Alexander vs. LAX, RVD vs. Ethan Page, and a Brian Cage update. Callis said he hopes Scarlett Bordeaux joins Bahh at ringside…

Johnny Impact and John E Bravo made their entrance first. John E was holding a giant red X which was the Red X that Johnny won at United We Stand for a future X Division Title shot. Elgin made his entrance next. The last one out was Pentagon Jr. who did his Cero Miedo thing with the fans… [c]

4. Pentagon Jr. vs. “Unbreakable” Michael Elgin vs. Johnny Impact (w/John E Bravo) in a triple threat for a future World Title shot. Josh Mathews said that John E Bravo was scum. Elgin, Penta, and Johnny went for quick pin attempts leading to a stalemate standoff. Johnny missed a cross kick on Penta. Elgin pulled Johnny outside so Penta could nail both men with a double sliding dropkick through the second rope. Pentagon said “escucha Puto Juanito, Cero Miedo” (listen “Johnny Bitch”, Zero Fear!). Penta kicked Elgin and hit Johnny with an Enzuigiri in the ring. Johnny eluded and kicked Penta with his signature parkour spot. Elgin gave Johnny a Power Bomb on the apron.

Elgin worked on Pentagon and gave him a corner splash. Pentagon slipped away and trapped Elgin in a Tree of Woe. Pentagon hit Elgin with the Del Rio footstomp. Elgin hit Pentagon on the top rope with an Enzuigiri. Callis noted that Pentagon was taking to much time with his Cero Miedo. Elgin no sold pentagon chops on the top rope. Johnny transformed Elgin’s superplex into his own springboard Tower of Doom spot. Johnny hit Penta with a thrust kick and then he took down Elgin with some nice Aikido. Penta entered the ring and did his Cero Miedo into a crossbody on Johnny. Pentagon also punched Elgin.

Elgin caught an incoming Pentagon and hit him with a Uranage. Elgin suplexed Johnny into the prone body of Pentagon. Elgin drew “Big Mike” chants. Johnny dodged an initial lariat but Elgin stopped on a dime and hit Johnny with a lariat. Elgin turned Johnny inside out with a Clothesline from Hell. Pentagon broke up the pinfall. Pentagon ate a right hand from Elgin. Penta punched back. Johnny shoved Pentagon outside. Johnny lifted Elgin and hit him with a Deep Six for a nearfall. Johnny counted down and missed the Impact Elbow because Elgin rolled away. Elgin hit Johnny with a three kick “SUPERKICK!” combo. Pentagon ended Elgin’s onslaught with a series of his signature sling blades.

Pentagon hit Elgin with a Three-Up Three-Down driver. Pentagon hit Johnny with a Backbreaker bomb for a nearfall. Elgin, Johnny, and Penta got tangled in the corner. Pentagon kicked Elgin to the floor. In an unfortunate move. Johnny tried to hit Pentagon with a cool frankensteiner but instead botched and fell to the ground. Josh tried to cover it up by saying that Johnny’s foot might have hurt Pentagon. Johnny nailed Elgin with a superkick. Johnny jabbed Pentagon with a chair. The referee tried to stop him but Johnny yelled that Triple Treats are no DQ. Johnny hit Pentagon with his signature running knee strike. Elgin rolled out of the way for Johnny’s Starship Pain. Elgin used a lariat and buckle bomb to set up and nail Johnny with an Elgin Bomb for the victory.

Michael Elgin defeated Johnny Impact and Pentagon Jr. via pinfall in 10:48 to earn a future Impact World Title shot.

Michael Elgin posed around the ring to close the show…

John’s Thoughts: One unfortunate botch aside (accident’s happen, it’s no big deal), that was a really good and entertaining match. I liked this and the Fenix vs. Edwards match for being really good, but not feeling the need to go all indie and pull out a thousand 450s and corkscrew planchas. If I had the call I wouldn’t have had Elgin win so early in his Impact run. Does Impact have him locked down long term and there’s a reason they’re rushing into this. Are they going to rush the title onto Elgin in the case that Cage has a long term injury? Who knows. My first choise would have been Pentagon, but I understand them not going with him if his future is up in the air. Therefore, I would have put Johnny over because Johnny has just been so good as a heel. Johnny is doing the best work of his career, and that includes his Lucha Underground run.

This was a fairly entertaining show. I might have liked this show better than NXT this week. The best part about what Impact has been doing is they are simply not being TNA and doing logical things all over the place in things that aren’t the Undead Realm. Even the things I had constructive criticisms tonight, they all had corrective measures implemented in the segments to right course like Konnan being in the opening segment or Ethan saving RVD from being confusing. Overall, check it out. If you’re a Lucha Underground fan, check it out too because Impact Wrestling is finally becoming Lucha Underground 2.0 in terms of putting all of your favorite Lucha Underground wrestlers (from Sami Callihan to Johnny Impact) in entertaining situations.

Peak Twitch Viewership: 6,750 (rounded up to the nearest 50)

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