By Chris Vetter, ProWrestling.net Contributor (@chrisvetter73)
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St. Louis Anarchy “Anarchy Forever”
Replay available via IndependentWrestling.TV
May 31, 2024 in Alton, Illinois at Spaulding Hall Club
The crowd was maybe 300; this is a deep room with narrow sides. A woman and a man called the action, but the man’s voice fell off and was entirely inaudible multiple times; it was strange, like listening to half of a conversation.
1. Laynie Luck defeated Anakin Murphy in an intergender match at 8:08. I’ve seen Anakin before and he has the scrawniest, thinnest arms I’ve ever seen on a pro wrestler, so these two are fairly similar in size. He hit a huracanrana. He tied her in an Octopus stretch; she slammed him into the corner to escape at 5:00. He hit an enzuigiri and a shotgun dropkick, then he dove through the ropes onto her. In the ring, he hit a DDT for a nearfall. Laynie fired back with a stunner for a believable nearfall at 7:00. They fought on the ring apron, where she hit a Death Valley Driver. She then hit a flying stunner in the ring for the pin. Decent action; she’s a better wrestler and I expected her to win.
* As Anakin was headed backstage, he was attacked by “Warhorse” Jake Parnell.
2. 1 Called Manders defeated Nick King at 9:47. My first time seeing King, who wore purple shorts and reminds me of a thinner Nick Offerman from “Parks and Recreation,” with curly brown hair and a thick mustache. He is scrawny compared to Manders. An intense lockup to open and they traded reversals on the mat. Manders tossed him gut-first onto the top rope at 4:30 and he hit some loud chops. They traded chops with Manders getting the better of the exchange. King applied a Fujiwara Armbar at 9:00, but Manders reached the ropes. King hit a German Suplex. However, moments later, Manders hit a decapitating clothesline for the pin. Solid match with the right winner.
3. Rahim De La Suede defeated Luke Langley at 8:12. My first time seeing Langley; he is white and he wore his jacket like AJ Styles with the hood covering his eyes, and he has a short buzz cut. Rahim is a regular in Glory Pro, so I’m well familiar with him; he’s comparable to Kofi Kingston. They brawled to the floor, where Langley dropped Rahim face-first on the ring apron at 2:00. In the ring, he hit a standing neckbreaker for a nearfall and he was in charge. Rahim fired up and hit some forearm strikes. Langley hit a dropkick into the corner at 6:30. Rahim missed a second-rope moonsault and Langley hit a buzzsaw kick. Rahim got a backslide for the pin out of nowhere. Solid match.
4. Ashlyn Alexander defeated Shazza McKenzie and Madi Monarch in a three-way at 7:20. I don’t know Ashlyn or Madi at all. Ashlyn is thick (think Piper Niven’s size), has long, straight blonde hair and heavily tattooed, and she gave the middle finger to fans as she walked to the ring. Shazza is a babyface here; I’m used to seeing her as a heel, and she wore bright pink today. Monarch is young and wore a cape that looks like butterfly wings; she wore white and gold, and she has reddish hair and she’s also a babyface. The babyfaces hit forearm strikes on Ashlyn. Shazza and Madi traded offense, and I’m guessing Madi is under 5’0″. Ashlyn hit a basement dropkick on Madi, then a snap suplex for a nearfall at 2:30.
Shazza tied both opponents in the ropes and hit some Yes Kicks. She hit a top-rope crossbody block on Ashlyn for a nearfall. They traded forearm strikes. Madi ran in and joined in the forearm exchange. Shazza hit a Northern Lights Suplex for a nearfall at 5:30. Madi hit a Jarrett-style Stroke on Shazza for a nearfall. Shazza hit the Splits Stunner on Madi. However, Ashlyn tossed Shazza to the floor and stole the pin on Madi. I enjoyed that; Shazza did a good job of holding this match together.
5. “Warhorse” Jake Parnell and Davey Vega defeated Aaron Williams and Gary Jay at 16:07. I’ve always said Gary Jay is a red-headed Brodie Lee with a long beard, and he’s a babyface here. Aaron Williams has a shiny bald head and a short, trimmed beard. Vega showed off his title belt; he’s similar to Trevor Lee/Cameron Grimes. I’ve noted before, but Parnell now wears all black and has a sinister look to him. With those tinted red glasses, it reminds me a bit of Steve “Mongo” McMichael’s look in his WCW run. Warhorse and Williams opened, and Aaron hit a Lionsault at 1:30.Vega tagged in to face Gary Jay. Jay and Williams hit stereo dives to the floor on the heels at 5:00. Jay hit a swinging Flatliner on Vega for a nearfall as they got back into the ring.
The heels beat down Gary and kept him in their corner, taking turns working him over for several minutes. Williams finally got the hot tag at 9:30 and he hit a Stinger Splash on Vega, then a powerslam, then a standing powerbomb for a nearfall. Gary tagged back in and he traded loud chops with Parnell at 13:30. Gary hit a hard clothesline and they were both down. Williams hit a dive to the floor on the heels. Victor Analog ran into the ring and was holding an old-fashioned TV. However, he hit Gary Jay in the head with the TV and the commentators were shocked. Parnell covered the knocked-out Jay for the cheap pin. Easily best match so far; all four are established ring veterans.
6. “New Money Mafia” ATM & Ken Broadway defeated “The New Guys” Jake Bosche & Scott Stanley and “Those Damn Coyotes” Christian Rose & Connor Hopkins and Adrian Surge & Tommy Davis in a four-way tag at 6:33. Broadway is a regular in New York’s House of Glory. My first time seeing Surge and Davis, and they are heels and Davis is MUCH shorter. Rose is a tall blond with a mullet and the sides of his head shaved; TDC routinely compete in Chicago. ATM and Bosche opened with a fast-paced exchange with neither landing a blow.
Stanley (think Alex Coughlin) traded blows with Davis. Bosche leapt off a short balcony and hit a corkscrew press onto everyone on the floor at 2:00. In the ring, Broadway hit an enzuigiri. Davis and Stanley traded blows. TDC beat up the New Guys. Broadway hit a flying Lungblower. Nice. Davis accidentally clotheslined teammate Surge at 6:00. Broadway hit a backbreaker over his knee on Davis, and ATM stomped on Davis for the pin. Too short to let anyone really standout, but I have liked what I’ve seen of ATM and Broadway, and they felt like the right team to win here.
7. Mad Dog Connelly defeated Chase Holliday at 5:12. Connelly carried a Hercules-style chain and he’s fairly hairy-chested. Holliday is Black and heavy with a massive gut hanging over his trunks. They traded punches, and Connelly hit a gut-wrench suplex, and that’s impressive as Holliday is a BIG man. Connelly choked out Holliday, while seated on the top turnbuckle, to win the match. Meh. (How is that legal? Connelly was using the ropes/turnbuckle to aid his victory!)
8. Billie Starkz defeated Mat Fitchett at 14:20. Starkz carried her ROH title belt. I’ve always compared the short Fitchett to Tom Lawlor; they are probably about the same height but he has a clear muscle mass advantage. Standing switches to open and she shoved him away at 2:00. She hit a second-rope flying double knees and some forearm strikes. Mat kicked out her left elbow at 4:00 and was booed; she was immediately favoring her left elbow and she slapped him several times with her right! Mat grabbed her and shoved her shoulder-first into a corner and he slammed her back-first on the ring apron. Back in the ring, Mat went back to work on the left arm. They went back to the floor; she pushed him up against a wall and chopped him at 7:00.
Back in the ring, he again stomped on her arm and tied her up on the mat, and the crowd rallied for Billie. She hit a roundhouse kick to his head for a nearfall at 8:30. He countered with a brainbuster for a nearfall, and he switched to a crossarm breaker. He hit a rolling kick and a Pele Kick. She nailed a neckbreaker over her knee for a nearfall at 10:30. Mat hit a Frankensteiner out of the corner and he applied a modified Triangle Choke. She went for a Swanton Bomb but he got his knees up, and he immediately applied a sleeper on the mat at 13:00. They got up and traded forearm strikes. She hit a spin kick, and this time she nailed the Swanton Bomb for the pin. Good match but it certainly felt like he was a cat playing with a mouse.
9. Thomas Shire defeated Jeremy Wyatt at 14:25. Wyatt looks like Tomasso Ciampa; bald with a beard that has a lot of gray and white whiskers. Shire got the streamer treatment from the fans. Shire is taller and wore a blue singlet. Mat reversals to open. Wyatt applied a crossarm breaker. He tied Shire in an Octopus. Shire hit a big boot to the chest at 4:30. Wyatt applied an anklelock at 7:00. He switched to a half-crab, but Shire reached the ropes at 9:30. Shire hit a second-rope flying shoulder block and they were both down.
Shire slammed him to the mat and applied a Fujiwara Armbar. Wyatt hit an Angle Slam. Shire did an Airplane Spin and slammed him to the mat at 12:00. Wyatt hit a huracanrana; he hooked both arms, rolled Shire over, and got a believable nearfall. They got up and traded forearm strikes. Shire applied a rear-naked choke at the same time Wyatt was twisting Shire’s knees. The ref called for the bell, as Wyatt had passed out from the choke. Okay match; they never got past second gear.
10. Derek Neal defeated Camaro Jackson to retain the Gateway Heritage Championship at 13:02. Camaro is a regular in Glory Pro Wrestling and he’s the short powerhouse I compare to Jonathan Gresham, and he’s thinned out in recent months. Neal has long stringy, wet hair; made me think of Chris Hero, or BJ Whitmer before he lost his hair. An intense lockup to open. Neal rolled to the floor to regroup at 2:30; he went to head to the back but Camaro grabbed him and hit some chops at ringside. In the ring, Neal took charge and hit some knee strikes to the back and a bodyslam. He hit a high back suplex at 6:30 for a nearfall. He pulled Camaro face-first into the middle turnbuckle and remained in charge.
Camaro hit a spear and they were both down at 9:00. Jackson hit a gutbuster over his knee and applied an STF. Camaro hit a Pounce, but it sent Neal flying into the ref. Camaro hit a clothesline for a visual pin, but we had no ref. Neal’s manager hopped in the ring, but KC Karrington made the save. However, Karrington struck Camaro, and he pulled a prone Neal onto a prone Camaro for the pin. “I thought he changed!” the female commentator said. Solid match.
Final Thoughts: An okay show; the audio problems really plagued my enjoyment of the action, to the point I turned down the volume rather than listen to half the conversation. Warhorse and Vega vs. Williams and Gary Jay earned best match. While I still don’t care much for intergender matches, Fitchett-Starkz takes second place. The main event is a distant third.
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