Glory Pro Wrestling “Ascend” episode 18 results: Vetter’s review of Swoggle vs. Effy vs. Dan the Dad vs. Shazza McKenzie, Mason St. Goods vs. Big Munch, Calvin Tankman vs. ATM

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By Chris Vetter, ProWrestling.net Contributor (@chrisvetter73)

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Glory Pro Wrestling “Ascend” (episode 18)
Premiered January 8, 2024 via YouTube.com
Taped November 19, 2023 in St. Louis, Missouri at South Broadway Athletic Club

Last week’s episode was a “best of” year-end show, so I skipped it. The lighting is decent and the crowd is maybe 200.

1. Calvin Tankman defeated ATM at 9:05. ATM is similar to Kofi Kingston; he shows good babyface fire but he’s giving up a lot of size to the massive Tankman. ATM hit some dropkicks. Tankman nailed a Pounce at 2:00. Calvin hit some snap suplexes, then a delayed vertical suplex for a nearfall. However, he missed a splash and they were both down at 5:30. ATM hit a Lungblower to the chin, then a springboard stunner. ATM hit a doublestomp on Cavin’s back for a nearfall at 8:00. One of Tankman’s faction partners hit ATM from behind. Calvin immediately hit a clothesline and a Rikishi Driver piledriver for the pin. Good action.

* A video package showed Camaro Jackson regaining the Crown of Glory title, but immediately being attacked by Jake Something.

2. Mason St. Goods (w/Cinko) defeated Big Munch at 7:33. Munch is a big Black man, on par with NXT’s Odyssey Jones. St. Goods also is Black but much thinner. They brawled to the floor. In the ring, St. Goods tried to springboard off the ropes, but Munch caught him. Munch hit some clotheslines and he slammed St. Goods. He hit a running buttbump in the corner.

Munch nailed the Mark Henry slam for a believable nearfall at 5:00. They stood on the ring apron, where Munch clotheslined him back into the ring. Cinko grabbed Munch’s ankle. St. Goods dove through the ropes onto Munch on the floor. Munch hit a big bodyslam. Cinko again interfered and the ref argued with him. St. Goods hit a punch to the jaw (he had something in his hand that he tossed out of the ring), then a springboard spin kick for the tainted pin.

3. Effy defeated Dan the Dad, Shazza McKie, and Swoggle in a four-way at 9:12. Well, this should be all comedy. Effy and Dan opened with a knucklelock and they gave each other Atomic Drops and sold the pain in their groins, and they did this over and over. Very juvenile humor. Swoggle and Shazza got in at 3:00 and he asked for a kiss; he closed his eyes. So, Effy replaced Shazza and he kissed Swoggle on the lips. Shazza hit a back suplex on Effy. Swoggle kissed her hand, so she nailed a spin kick on his head. Swoggle gave Dan a German Suplex and a buttbump in the corner.

Effy hit a backbreaker over his knee on Shazza at 5:00. Shazza nailed the Splits Stunner on Effy. Everyone was getting tripped by people at ringside. Dan hit his jab punches on Effy at 7:00. Dan hit a spinebuster on Shazza and he unbuttoned his shirt and hit a People’s Elbow on her. Swoggle hit a stunner on Dan. Shazza hit a straight punch to Swoggle’s groin. Effy hit a Whoopee Cushion buttdrop on Shazza’s chest for the pin. I assumed she was winning. Alright comedy match.

Final Thoughts: I enjoy these Glory Pro shows, and I really liked that opening match. Sure, Tankman was going to win, but ATM is a talented hand. As per usual here, Glory Pro seems to put their newer, greener wrestlers in the second match. Munch is just so big, he’s going to get looked at just for his size. I admittedly am not a comedy match guy, but the main event was acceptable; those are four talented wrestlers who are good at doing what they were aiming for. The episode clocks in at 41 minutes, on par with a one-hour TV show subtracting commercial breaks.

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