By Chris Vetter, ProWrestling.net Contributor (@chrisvetter73)
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Glory Pro Wrestling “Wrestle Pocalypse”
Replay available via FITE.TV
January 7, 2023 in St. Louis, Missouri at Delmar Hall
* The show opened backstage with Tootie Lynn, who is upset that some of her teammates have “stabbed her in the back.” She is ready to take on Kylie Rae.
* Moses cut a backstage promo, about facing Rohit Raju later. Camaro Jackson then cut a backstage promo, saying he isn’t “a hard man to find.” He is ready for his match later against Jake Something. Jake then cut a promo from his car, saying he made the GPW title famous.
We finally head to the arena, but it appears we have maybe 100-200 fans in attendance, in a very small room. Greg Jova (spelling?) provided commentary. The show started at 6:30 p.m. CST with two “bonus matches,” with the main show starting at 7 p.m.
1. Mason St. Goods and Chris Hendrix defeated Campbell Myers and SK Bishop at 8:29. Myers and Bishop wore identical red trunks with their names on the butt; Myers is white and Bishop is Black, and Jova made it clear these two are students/recent graduates. Hendrix and St. Goods are both Black men and seem more polished. Pretty standard, basic tag stuff, with Bishop and Myers in charge most of the match, untill St. Goods made a hot tag. Myers hit a frogsplash for a nearfall at 6:30. Either Goods or Hendrix got a rollup for the pin.
2. Benjamin Trust vs. Ezio Orlandi at 5:03. Trust wore a jacket and sunglasses. Orlandi wore a chain around his neck, like Hercules, and he’s more muscular than his opponent. Orlandi hit a standing powerbomb for a nearfall. Trust applied an anklelock, sat down on the mat, and Orlandi tapped out. This felt like they were going at three-quarters speed; both definitely green and learning.
3. Rahim de la Suede defeated ATM, Heather Reckless, and Ethan Price in a four-way at 6:16. Suede is a Black man with dreadlocks in red pants; think Swerve Strickland. ATM also is Black with dreadlocks in green pants; think Kofi Kingston. Reckless is barely 5’0″ and has had numerous AEW Dark/Elevation matches. Price is white and he’s a dork, billed as “a big strong boy.” I know I right this all the time, but it just absurd to think a woman as small as Heather would have any chance in a match against these men. She is just so tiny.
Reckless hit a top-rope crossbody block to the floor on all three; Price caught her, and he swung her body to hit the other opponents. In the ring, ATM hit a Falcon Arrow on Reckless for a nearfall at 3:00. Heather hit a second-rope moonsault. ATM nailed a superkick on Reckless. Price hit a German Suplex. Price hit a double bulldog. Price hit a DDT on ATM, but Rahim jumped in, tossed Price to the floor and covered the prone ATM for the cheap pin. Ok match; Rahim is definitely the best of these four, so the right man won.
4. Angelina Love defeated Blair Onyx at 8:38. Onyx also has had a handful of AEW matches; she wears a spider-themed outfit with jet black hair, and she has has a height and weight advantage. Love bailed to the floor to regroup shortly into the match. Back in the ring, Love choked her in the ropes and was the heel, working her over with basic moves. Onyx hit a Flatliner for a nearfall at 7:00. Love then hit her own Flatliner for a nearfall. Love argued with the referee. She hit an enziguri, but Onyx didn’t go down. Love nailed a Mafia Kick for the clean pin. Solid.
5. Moses defeated Rohit Raju at 10:26. Raju formerly of Impact Wrestling, competed on AEW Dark earlier this week. Moses wore a yellow singlet; he’s also Black with dreadlocks. Moses hit a Shotgun dropkick at 3:00, then a flapjack for a nearfall. Rohit hit a snap suplex and a doublestomp to the chest for a nearfall at 6:00. Moses hit a flying back elbow and fired up. He hit a springboard bulldog, and they were both down at 8:30. Rohit hit a clothesline to the back of the head for a nearfall. Moses got a rollup, leaned back for leverage, and scored the pin out of nowhere. Solid match.
6. Curry Man defeated Dan the Dad at 15:36. OK, this should be all comedy. I see a tuft of hair from the back of his head, so unless it’s part of the outfit, this is NOT Christopher Daniels. They traded armholds early. Dan got his coffee cup; they traded some moves while Dan held onto his cup and took some sips. Silliness. Curry Man poured some hot sauce in the coffee; Dan took a drink and spit it everywhere. Dan got angry and ripped off his shirt. Curry Man hit a backbreaker over his knee for a nearfall at 8:00. Dan hit an Electric Chair back drop, and both were down.
Dan hit a sidewalk slam. He got the bottle of hot sauce, and he poured it down Curry Man’s throat. He hit an elbow drop for a nearfall at 10:30. Curry Man did the “Hogan fired up” sequence including a Hogan Legdrop. He clotheslined them both over the top rope to the floor. In the ring, they hit simultaneous clotheslines. They got up and traded forearm shots. Dan placed CM’s feet on the top rope and hit a DDT at 15:00. Dan hit a Helluva Kick. Curry Man put Dan on his shoulders and hit a Burning Hammer for the clean pin. That was supremely watchable and fun.
7. “The Hustle and the Muscle” Xavier Walker and Karam (w/Rohit Raju) defeated Davey Vega and Anakin Murphy to win the GPW Tag Team Titles at 8:07. Murphy has the smallest, skinniest arms in pro wrestling, and his chop had absolutely no effect on the biger Karam. Xavier, who is a really tall black man (think EJ Nduka) beat up Vega. Xavier hit a delayed vertical suplex. Vega and Murphy began working over Xavier. Karam made the hot tag at 5:00. Karam hit a double chokeslam and got a huge pop. Xavier hit a double clothesline. He then hit a straight punch to Anakin’s jaw and pinned him. New champs!
* After the match, Karam and Raju beat up Xavier Walker! This was not hinted at during the match. Raju and Karam left with the tag team titles.
Intermission. Danhausen defeated Kody Lane at 11:42. This is the intermission “bonus match” from a prior show. Again, Kody reminds me of the flamboyant Juice Robinson. Danhausen tried to curse Kody. Kody dominated early. Danhausen tied him up in the ropes in a submission hold. Kody hit a senton for a nearfall at 3:30, and he stood on his groin in the corner. Danhausen hit a German release suplex.
Danhausen hit some clotheslines and a Northern Lights Suplex at 8:30. He hit a Go To Sleep, but Lane stumbled and fell out of the ring. Lane hit a standing powerbomb, then a Death Valley Driver for a believable nearfall at 10:30. Danhausen applied a mid-ring Octopus submission hold, and Lane tapped out. Good match. I am a big fan of intermission matches for those of us watching live at home.
8. Mike Outlaw (w/Rahim de la Suede) defeated Kenny Alfonzo at 10:19. Both are Black men, with Outlaw thicker and a clear weight advantage. Alfonzo went for a handspring move off the ropes, but Rahim hit him at 2:30, allowing Outlaw to take control of the offense. Outlaw grounded him and applied a sleeper. Alfonzo hit a DDT at 6:00, and the crowd rallied for him. Alfonso hit a huracanrana for a nearfall.
Alfonzo hit a standing powerbomb, and he applied an STF, but Rahim helped pull Outlaw out of the ring at 9:00. In the ring, Outlaw hit a twisting suplex. Alfonzo hit another huracanrana for a believable nearfall The ref got bumped. Outlaw hit Alfonzo with metal handcuffs and scored the tainted pin. OK match.
9. Tootie Lynn defeated Kylie Rae at 13:57. An intense lockup to start. Rae, of course, just came off an appearance on WWE Main Event, while Tootie routinely appears for NWA. Tootie hit a headscissors takedown. Tootie applied a cross-armbreaker. Kylie was a bit vicious, but a smile on her face, and the commentator was surprised by her actions. Kylie hit a sidewalk slam for a nearfall at 8:00. She hit several kneestrikes to the lower back and was dominating the action.
Tootie finally hit a back suplex, and they were both down at 11:00. Tootie hit a leg lariat and was fired up. Kylie applied a Crippler Crossface in the middle of the ring, and she is no longer smiley-happy Kylie. She hit a superkick and was frustrated when Tootie kicked out of a pin attempt. Tootie applied a Fujiwara Armbar out of nowhere, and Kylie tapped out. Very good women’s match. They hugged afterward.
* Missa Kate hopped in the ring and attacked Tootie Lynn.
10. Kody Lane defeated Warhorse via DQ at 17:05. Mat reversals to open. Warhorse is wearing Hogan yellow-and-red pants. They brawled to the floor, with Lane in charge. Warhorse clotheslined Lane to the floor at 6:00. In the ring, Lane hit a senton for a nearfall. They brawled back to the floor, where Warhorse whipped Lane into a guardrail at 9:00. In the ring, Warhorse hit a powerslam for a nearfall. Warhorse hit a clothesline for a nearfall.
Lane nailed a piledriver for a believable nearfall at 11:30, and they were both down. Warhorse ran off the ring apron and hit a double stomp on Lane’s back on the floor. In the ring, Warhorse hit another top-rope double stomp to the back for a nearfall. Warhorse came off the top rope again, but Kody got a foot up. Warhorse accidentally splashed the ref in the corner, and Lane immediately hit a standing powerbomb. Lane brought a chair into the ring, but Warhorse hit a low blow punch before Lane could use it. Warhorse then hit Lane in the back with the chair as the ref was getting back to his feet, and the ref disqualified Warhorse.
11. Camaro Jackson defeated Jake Something to retain the Crown of Glory Title at 19:10. Camaro is the short, Black powerhouse (think Jonathan Gresham), and Jake towers over him. An intense lockup to start. They traded several shoulder tackles before Jake finally dropped Camaro. They traded chops. They brawled to the floor at 5:00 and brawled in front of the crowd. Jake climbed in the ring and dove onto Camaro.
Camaro fired up and got in some offense, but Jake hit a Falcon Arrow for a nearfall at 8:30. Jake nailed a short-arm clothesline for a nearfall. They traded clotheslines. Camaro dropped him with a flying shoulder tackle at 11:00, and they were both down. Camaro hit a sideslam, then a spinebuster for a nearfall. Jake hit a Death Valley Driver for a nearfall at 14:00 (in a nice touch, Camaro hit some elbows to the side of the head to try and escape the move.)
Camaro hit a uranage and was fired up. Jake tied Camaro’s arm in the ring ropes and began hitting multiple punches on him. Jake nailed a Boss Man swinging side slam for a believable nearfall at 16:30, and he was incredulous he didn’t win. They hit simultaneous clotheslines. Camaro hit an Alabama Slam and a decapitating clothesline for the pin. Really strong WWE-style match; I do mean that as a compliment.
Final Thoughts: That was a really good main event; it was hard-hitting and a believable fight. I’ll go with Tootie-Kylie for second-best, then Lane-Warhorse for third, even with the cop-out finish.
Overall, a solid show but no must-see matches. Perhaps the biggest letdown was a small crowd, and unfortunately, those seated across from the hard camera were pretty lifeless and disinterested in the product.
In retrospect, if I was GPW, I wouldn’t have shown Kody Lane losing to Danhausen as the intermission match, knowing Lane was in the semi-main event.