By Chris Vetter, ProWrestling.net Contributor (@chrisvetter73)
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Blitzkrieg Pro Wrestling “The 5th Annual Luau”
Replay available via IndependentWrestling.TV
July 7, 2023 in Enfield, Connecticut at Old Country Banquet Hall
This appears to be a very nice banquet/wedding hall. This is a packed crowd in the 300 range. Alyssa Marino and Donnie Lorenz provided commentary. While this is my first BPW show, I am familiar with most of the wrestlers here, but I admittedly tuned in for the final four matches.
1. Brogan Finlay and TJ Crawford co-won a 10-man Royal Rumble that also included: Bryce Donovan, Steve Somerset, Love Doug, 50 Cal, Stephen Azure, CPA, Delightful Dan the God Damn Candyman, and Logan Black at 22:51. The winner gets a title shot later in the evening. I have compared Donovan to a taller Nick Jackson, but he has his hair in a ponytail here and I barely recognized him. Donovan and Black started. Somerset, the Mean Street Posse knockoff, joined at 2:00. Love Doug was #4 at 4:00. Stephen Azure (Somerset’s partner) was next in. Donovan got tossed at 7:30 and he was incredulous; he was the first to be eliminated.
Brogan Finlay was #6 and he hit a nice dropkick. Black hit a neckbreaker over his knee and pinned Doug at 9:30. Crawford is #7. 50 Cal is #8; he wears Hawaiian and tye-dye shirts and is a fan favorite. 50 Cal got both Azure and Somerset to tap out to a double Camel Clutch at 13:00. Candyman is #9; he wears an outfit like a 1960s candy store worker or ice cream truck driver, but he was tossed almost immediately. CPA is #10 at 16:00. He peeled off one button-down shirt to reveal an identical one underneath. So, we have five of the 10 remaining. 50 Cal was eliminated.
CPA got a schoolyard takedown and rollup to pin Black at 20:30. CPA hit his modified 619 on Crawford. Black — who was on the floor — jawed at CPA; Crawford snuck up and eliminated CPA to loud boos. Black and CPA brawled to the back. We are down to just Finlay vs. Crawford. Crawford hit a top-rope superplex; however, their feet got entangled and it appears we have a double-pin! The crowd immediately chanted “triple threat!” The promoter came to the ring and made the title match a triple threat.
2. Skylar defeated Haley Dylan at 11:21. Dylan is the redhead who still looks like a teen and she skipped to the ring. My first time seeing Skylar; she’s a bit bigger and she wore white-and-black polka dots. Dylan attacked before the bell, and she’s the heel. In the ring, Dylan applied a Fujiwara Armbar and targeted the left arm. Skylar hit a German Suplex and a Pele Kick, and she applied a half-crab. Skylar applied a Muta Lock. Dylan hit a piledriver out of the ropes for a nearfall at 10:00. Skylar nailed a Jay Driller for the pin. Solid match. They are both green but promising.
3. JGeorge and Angelo Carter defeated “Mutually Assured Destruction” Perry Von Vicious and Rip Byson at 10:45. JGeorge has the big poofy hair like No Way Jose. Carter also is Black and has long blond braids. MAD both look like a shorter Brodie Lee, with big beards and crazed hair, and they are the babyfaces. The heels worked over PVV for several minutes; this has been a fairly basic tag match. Rip finally made the hot tag at 8:30, and he hit a Jay Driller for a nearfall, but Carter made the save. JGeorge hit a scissor kick to the back of the head. They all fought in the ring, trading forearm shots. Carter hit a low blow when the ref was distracted. The ref turned around to see Carter on top of PVV and counted the cheap pin. Just so-so.
4. Leary defeated Jeff Cannonball in a “Fans Bring the Pool Toys” match at 14:45. This seems like it should be comedy as we have pool noodles brought to the ring, but there are sharp, woooden sticks in some of them! Cannonball is bald and perhaps 400 pounds. Leary wore a flowery outfit. I’ll be blunt; neither man looks like a wrestler. They used water guns, and Cannonball jabbed a pineapple across Leary’s forehead. Leary hit Cannonball over the head with a pool noodle covered in thumbtacks and scored the pin. I hated everything about this match. Neither of these men belong in a ring.
* Stephen Azure and Stephen Stetson returned to the ring. Neither man won the opening 10-man Rumble. Azure issued a challenge to the ring crew guy, who I have seen wrestle once before. He looks like a teenager and is scrawny.
5. The Sweeper defeated Stephen Azure (w/Stephen Stetson) at 1:47. Azure hit a side Russian Legsweep early on and was beating up the kid. Azure accidentally kicked Stetson. The Sweeper hit a Canadian Destroyer for the pin. Blah. At least it was short.
6. Dustin Waller, Ichiban, and Sammy Diaz defeated “Young, Dumb N Broke” Jordan Oliver, Charlie Tiger, and Griffin McCoy at 19:26. OK, we are the part of the show I am excited for. Waller (think young Trent Beretta) and McCoy started. Ichiban and Oliver entered at 2:00, and Ichiban immediately got a Crucifix Takedown for a nearfall. Ichiban’s team turns working over Tiger in their corner. Ichiba’s team hit a triple dropkick on McCoy at 5:00 and they were in control. Tiger hit a back suplex on Ichiban for a nearfall. Oliver entered and hit a snap suplex on Ichiban, and the YDB team began working Ichiban over.
McCoy was cheating, grabbing the ropes for leverage as he tied up Ichiban. Waller finally made the hot tag at 10:00. Diaz hit a top-rope crossbody block on Tiger. Olver and Diaz traded mid-ring forearm shots. Oiver hit the Acid Kick, then his sit-out powerbomb for a believable nearfall on Diaz. Tiger hit a spear on Diaz. Ichiban hit a superkick, then a Canadian Destroyer on McCoy for a nearfall at 12:30. Waller and Oliver traded mid-ring forearm shots. Ichiban hit a huracanrana on Oliver.
Tiger hit a Jay Driller piledriver on Ichiban for a nearfall at 15:00. Ichiban hit a stunner on Tiger, then a Canadian Destroyer for a nearfall. McCoy clotheslined Waller to the floor, then he hit a plancha. Ichiban dove to the floor. Waller hit a moonsault to the floor, with his foot clipping the stage coing down. Oliver hit an Asai Moonsaullt at 18:30, landing in the crowd, with the fans chanting “holy shit!” Waller hit a flip dive to the floor on everyone. In the ring, Waller hit the Black Mamba frogsplash for the pin. That was breath-taking and fun; messy at times, but in a good way.. They got a standing ovation, and they all shook hands after. Classy.
7. Ava Everett defeated Billie Starkz at 9:50. Ava appeared on the MLW premium live event a day after this show; she has long, black hair; she did not bring her WXW title belt with her. Ava stalled at the bell and the fans taunted her with a “coward!” chant. Billie got a sunset flip for a nearfall at 2:30. She went for a dive to the floor, but Ava cut her off. Ava hit a snap suplex for a nearfall, and she took control. Billie hit a spin kick to the shoulder, then a neckbreaker over the knee for a nearfall at 7:30.
Ava hit a DDT for a nearfall. Billie hit a dive through the ropes. In the ring, Ava hit a stunner for a believable nearfall. Billie hit a spin kick to the face, and she set put Ava on her shoulders for a Victory Roll. However, Ava broke free, got a rollup with a handful of tights, and scored the cheap pin. Ok match; Billie is clearly far superior in the ring at this point.
8. Andy Brown defeated Brogan Finlay and TJ Crawford in a three-way to retain the Bedlam Championship at 10:25. Crawford and Finlay were the co-winners of the show-opening scramble to earn this title shot. Brown is the thick Black man I’ve seen a few times now in the Northeast indies. They traded quick rollups, and they all brawled to the floor, with Brown hitting some running boots on each opponent. In the ring, Finlay and Brown traded chops at 4:00, and FInlay hit a snap suplex for a nearfall. Brown fired back with a spinebuster and a senton for a nearfall.
Crawford returned to the ring and hit a stunner on Finlay for a nearfall. FInlay hit a German Suplex on Brown for a nearfall, but Crawford made the save, and they were all down at 7:00. They all traded forearm shots while on their knees. They got up and kept trading blows. Brown and Crawford hit stereo superkicks on Finlay. Brown hit a stunner on Crawford. Crawford hit an Exploder on Finlay into the corner, onto Brown at 9:00.
Crawford hit a spin kick to Brown’s jaw for a nearfall, but Finlay made the save. Finlay hit a Death Valley Driver on Crawford on the ring apron. In the ring, Finlay went for a backslide, but Brown rolled through it. Brown immediately hit a diving forearm on Finlay’s head for the pin. Really good action.
* Crawford got on the mic. He said this is the last time they are wrestling here, which drew some boos; he referenced new owners of the building. A promoter then got in the ring and thanked the building owners and a few other people for all their time and efforts into making shows happen in this venue; this really feels like a goodbye.
9. Lince Dorado defeated Anthony Greene at 18:46. Dorado wore his Hugh Hefner robe. Standing switches to open. Dorado went for a dive through the ropes, but Greene caught him and hit a DDT on the ring apron at 5:30, and they brawled on the floor. Dorado leapt off a stage and hit a huracanrana on the floor. In the ring, Greene hit a butterfly suplex at 7:30. Dorado hit a huracanrana, then a springboard huracanrana at 10:30. Dorado hit an impressive dive over the top rope to the floor onto Greene, and the crowd chanted, “Lucha!”
Dorado placed Greena along his back and hit a stomach-first slam to the mat, then he applied a Fujiwara Armbar at 12:30. Dorado hit a clothesline for a believable nearfall, then an enzuigiri. Greene fired back with a Doctor Bomb/gut-wrench powerbomb, and we got a “this is awesome!” chant. He went for a springboard move, but Dorado hit him with a dropkick in the back, then a brainbuster for a nearfall at 16:00. Dorado hit a mid-ring-huracanrana, then a handspring-back-stunner for a believable nearfall. “Something has got to give,” Marino said.
Greene set up some chairs on the floor; he and Dorado brawled on the top rope in the corner, and we got a “please don’t die!” chant. However, Dorado hit a Frankensteiner into the ring, then a top-rope Shooting Star Press for the pin. A really good match. Let’s be honest — on some shows, this would have been an opening contest and given eight minutes, but given the time, these two put on a really good main event showcase. They shook hands and the fans chanted, “thank you Blitzkrieg!”
Final Thoughts: Unbelievable how much better the last four matches are than the first five. You don’t usually see such a vast split in match quality on oe show. The pool weapon match is one of the worst things I’ve seen in the ring this calendar year; I won’t belabor the point. So, instead I’ll pivot and say the last four matches met my hopes. I’ll go with the six-man tag for best, the main event for second place, and the three-way for third.
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