Expect the Unexpected “Lightning in a Bottle” results: Vetter’s review of Jordan Oliver vs. Marcus Mathers in a TLC match, “The SAT” Joel Maximo and Jose Maximo vs. “Natural Vibes” Big Boss Shimizu and KZY, Matt Tremont vs. Akira for the ETU Championship, Matt Cardona vs. Danny Demanto in a No DQ match

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By Chris Vetter, ProWrestling.net Contributor (@chrisvetter73)

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Expect the Unexpected “Lightning in a Bottle”
Replay available via IndependentWrestling.TV
February 26, 2023 in Ridgefield Park, N.J. at the KOC Hall

This show aired live on IWTV. The crowd is maybe 200 in a large conference hall or convention center.  Righteous Jesse and Jack Solomon provided commentary. I like that they put their names on the screen.

1. Ken Broadway defeated Kevin Blackwood, Steve Pena, and Alec Price in a four-way at 11:03. I’ve liked what I’ve seen of Broadway; he has the swagger and moves of Ashante Thee Adonis; he got on the mic and boasted that he’s undefeated in ETU. I don’t think I’ve seen Pena before; he has a great physique and has his hair in a ponytail like Wardlow. Price came out last to a big pop; he’s been all over the indy scene in recent months. Interesting that this is tag rules, so only two are in the match at a time. Blackwood and Price opened, had a quick exchanged and a standoff.

Pena and Broadway squared off and they traded chops. Blackwood hit some Yes Kicks on Pena. Price hit a standing moonsault on Broadway. Pena hit a T-Bone suplex on Price at 4:30. Broadway and Pena began working over Price; the commentator agree it is starting to look like a tag match. Blackwood entered and hit a suplex into the corner. Price hit a stunner on Broadway and he planted him with a DDT for a nearfall at 7:30.

Pena hit a fisherman’s buster on Price. Broadway hit a twisting Flatliner on Price. Broadway and Blackwood traded forearm shots. Price hit a Dragon Suplex on Broadway and a Helluva Kick. Price nailed a second-rope legdrop on Broadway, then he dove to the floor. In the ring, Blackwood nailed a top-rope doublestomp to the chest. Broadway hit a German Suplex to pin Blackwood. A fantastic opener that got this crowd energized.

2. B3cca defeated Ultra Violette at 6:59. B3cca has orange hair with a ponytail on top of her head. She got on the mic and belittled the crowd for booing her last time. I have seen Violette in New York’s House of Glory, and she has purple hair. Violette dove through the ropes onto B3cca just seconds into the match. B3cca choked Violette in the ropes, and she hit a Helluva Kick at 2:30. Violette fired up and hit some clotheslines, and a German Suplex with a high bridge for a nearfall. B3cca hit a TKO stunner for a believable nearfall at 5:00.

Violette hit a running stunner for a nearfall, then she tied B3cca up in a mid-ring Octopus submissison hold, but B3cca escaped. B3cca hit a senton and a Lionsault for the pin. The commentators weren’t expecting that. Solid match for the time given. B3cca got on the mic and ‘sang;’ the crowd chanted to “cut the mic!” Funny.

Matt Cardona hit the ring, wearing his Indiana Jones outfit he wore in GCW last week. He had two title belts over his shoulders. “All hail the death match king!” he said. He called himself “the indy god,” and he belittled the poor conditions of the ring.

3. Matt Cardona defeated Danny Demanto in a no-DQ match at 19:41. Chairs and tables were already placed around ringside. Cardona stalled on the floor. Demanto hit a shoulder tackle and Cardona bailed again. Demanto got on the mic and announced this would be falls count anywhere. They brawled around the room, in front of the merchandise tables. Demanto got a door covered in beer cans at 7:00 and he set it up next to ringside. Cardona took control in the ring, and he choked Demanto while doing pushups. Cardona applied a Figure Four Leglock at 10:30.

Demanto gave Cardona a backbody drop onto a door set up in the corner. Demanto gave Cardona a stunner across four open chairs at 14:00. Cardona threw a chair at Demanto’s head and hit a big boot for a nearfall. Cardona gave Demanto a Death Valley Driver over the top rope onto the beer can-covered table; Demanto really landed on his butt, not his back, so it didn’t look all that dangerous. In the ring, Cardona hit his leg drop for a nearfall at 17:00.

A heavy guy hopped in the ring and hit Cardona from behind. Demanto hit Cardona with a title belt. Demanto hit a top-rope frogsplash as Cardona was lying on a table and got a believable nearfall. However, Cardona hit a low blow punt kick, then his second-rope legdrop for the pin.

* As the ring crew was cleaning up debris in the ring, Vargas entered the ring and beat them up. Vargas appears to be a Samoan similar to Umaga in size, and he’s crazy. He has his face covered in paint. The commentators said Vargas was not listed as being on the show. That brought out 1 Called Manders, and we have an unannounced match!

4. Vargas defeated 1 Called Manders at 4:42. Right on cue, the announcers compared Vargas to Umaga as they brawled on the floor. In the ring, Vargas hit a bodyslam, tossing the big Manders across the ring, for a nearfall at 3:00. Manders fired back with some hard chops. Manders hit a Bulldog Powerslam for a nearfall. Vargas nailed a standing powerbomb for the pin. That was good but shockingly short.

* Intermission, which has been edited out of the replay.

5. Brandon Kirk and Kasey Kirk defeated Yoya and Janai Kai in a mixed tag match at 8:59. Yoya, the short Cambodian man, started against the tiny Kasey, and they are the same height, trading mat reversals. He caught her with a kick to the face. Janai entered at 1:30 and they worked over Kasey. Brandon tagged in to face Janai and the crowd taunted him with the “you’re gonna get your f**ken head kicked in!” chant. She did hit sone nice spin kicks on him. Brandon leveled Yoya with a hard chop at 4:30. He picked up Yoya in his arms and “rocked the baby” until Yoya fell asleep, and the whole crowd got quiet to not wake him up. This is good comedy as Brandon is trying to get a three-count while not waking up the sleeping baby. Of course, Yoya rolled him over and got a nearfall.

Yoya got in and hit her speedball kicks to Brandon’s ribs. Brandon hit a Death Valley Driver on Yoya. Yoya hit a piledriver move on Kasey. Brandon nailed a piledriver move on Yoya, but Janai made the save at 8:00. Brandon hit a Burning Hammer on Yoya for the clean pin. Those last two minutes were good; I am torn on the comedy.

6. Matt Tremont defeated Akira to retain the ETU Heavyweight Title at 16:46. These guys are generally seen as death match fighters. They brawled to the floor in the first match and traded chops and punches in front of the fans. Sure enough, both were bleeding from their foreheads. Akira bodyslammed Tremont from the apron to the floor. Back in the ring, Akira applied a Fujiwara Armbar at 9:30. Tremont hit a Death Valley  Driver for a nearfall.

Tremont nailed a clothesline for a nearfall at 14:00. Akira applied a heel hook on the mat, but Tremont eventually reached the ropes. Akira charged at Tremont, but Matt caught him and hit a Death Valley Driver out of nowhere for the pin. Far less bloody than I would have expected; not blood-free but less than anticipated.

7. “Natural Vibes” Big Boss Shimizu and KZY defeated “The SAT” Joel Maximo and Jose Maximo at 16:47. Shimizu and KZY (pronounced Kay Zee) are Japanese wrestlers from Dragon Gate touring the U.S. recently; they were in singles matches for Garden State Pro Wrestling last month. BBS is thick like Tomohiro Ishii, but he has colorful orange-and-green hair. The SAT wore their camouflage gear. Joel and Shimizu started, with BBS hitting a big shoulder tackle. Party guy KZY entered and did a Scotty 2 Hotty Worm. The Dragon Gate duo stood on Jose. Shimizu laid in some hard chops and a fallaway slam.

Jose hit a spinning leg kick on KZY; Joel tagged in and applied a Figure Four Leglock on KZY, and the SAT worked him over. Shimizu finally made the hot tag at 9:30 and he dropped the SAT with shoulder tackles, then Stinger Splashes into the corner. Shimizu put both men on his shoulders, then dropped them both to the mat. He again put them both on his shoulders, walked to the center of the ring, and nailed a double Samoan Drop. Nice showing of strength. KZY hit a flip dive to the floor on the SAT. Shimizu then nailed a rolling summersault from the apron onto the SAT on the floor at 12:00.

In the ring, the Dragon Gate duo hit a splash for a nearfall. Shimizu hit a Pounce. The Dragon Gate guys hit a European Uppercut-and-German Suplex combo, and suddenly everyone was down. The SAT hit a Spin Cycle face plant on KZY, and they went for the Spanish Fly on Kimizu, but BBS fought it off. A Maximo hit a superplex on Shimizu for a nearfall. The Dragon Gate guys hit a pop-up into a European Uppercut. KZY hit a Swanton Bomb, and Shimizu immediately nailed a top-rope frogsplash for the pin. A really entertaining match, and a treat to see these guys compete in the U.S.

8. Marcus Mathers defeated Jordan Oliver in a TLC match at 32:47. The commentators said the last time these two fought here, the match went nearly 40 minutes. The winner of this match will face Masha Slamovich. They immediately traded forearm shots and loud chops; the commentators make it clear this is just a no-DQ match as there isn’t anything suspended from the ceiling to pull down. They brawled briefly on the floor. Oliver set up a table on the floor at 7:00. Mathers leapt off a ladder onto Oliver on the floor.

In the ring, Mathers slammed a ladder across Oliver’s back at 10:30. Back on the floor, Oliver hit a running kick to the face, and Oliver was bleeding on his forehead. In the ring, Oliver hit a Vader Bomb onto a ladder that was lying on Mathers at 15:30. Mathers hit a Sabin-style Cradle Shock slam for a nearfall. Oliver hit a DDT from the ring apron through the table set up at ringside at 19:30. In the ring, Oliver hit his jumping sit-out powerbomb and a Mafia Kick; he went for another powerbomb but he collapsed and sold pain in his stomach. Mathers tied Oliver in the Tree of Woe, put a chair over his face, and threw a chair at that chair, at 25:00. Oliver freed himself and he has significant bloodloss on his face, too.

Oliver hit a second-rope piledriver through a table set up in the ring for a nearfall at 27:30; at this point it is absurd what they are kicking out of. Oliver hit anotheer piledriver and a Clout Cutter for a believable nearfall at 30:30. Mathers climbed to the top of the ladder and hit a Swanton Bomb for a believable nearfall. Mathers hit a Jay Driller onto a folded ladder, then a 450 Splash onto Oliver, who was lying on the folded ladder, for the pin. A really good match, but unnecessarily long.

* Mathers got on the mic and he called out Masha Slamovich.

Final Thoughts: I narrowly go with the main event for best match, but it’s closer than I would have thought. Some of the kickouts were just ridiculous. Oliver is one of the best going on the indy scene today, and Mathers is showing why he’s also a rising star. Again, these guys are literally booked every weekend all over the country right now.

I nearly went with SAT vs. the Dragon Gate duo for best match, just because it was fresh and felt so special; it is a match that may happen just once ever. I am a sucker for crazy multi-man matches, and I’m giving the four-way opener third place, just ahead of Cardona-Demanto for honorable mention.

I want to circle back to the Yoya comedy. While it was funny and original, I abhor treating grown men like children just because they are short. We’ve seen Vince’s brand of ha-ha comedy where he belittled short men for decades. Yoya is quite talented; he just happens to be maybe 5’1″. I’ve said it before — I’d rather watch him than Marko Stunt. Now, I don’t want to see Yoya trading blow-for-blow with a 6’6″ 300 pound beast, but he doesn’t have to be the butt of short-man jokes.

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