Powell’s Impact Wrestling Hit List: Lashley and Alberto El Patron face mystery challengers for their respective titles, Rosemary vs. Laurel Van Ness for the Knockouts Title, Low Ki vs. Caleb Konley for the X Division Championship

By Jason Powell

Impact Wrestling Hits

Lashley and Alberto El Patron opening: Alberto was a good choice to open the show to the excitable Indian crowd. He did a good job of hyping them up before Lashley headed to the ring. Lashley was back to doing what he does best. This wasn’t the confusing nice guy character featured in recent video packages. Lashley was the bad ass heel champion who isn’t intimidated by anyone or anything. Bruce Prichard’s podcast is a smash hit, but apparently not so much in India, as his entrance was greeted by the sounds of crickets from the otherwise great crowd.

Low Ki vs. Caleb Konley for the X Division Championship: Low Ki’s video game tribute suit will never be for me. Konley being rewarded with a title shot his character did nothing to earn was baffling. Putting those issues aside, this was an entertaining match. Here’s hoping they keep Konley out of the silly Suicide suit and do more with him. The post match angle with Sonjay asking for a title shot while playing to the Indian crowd came off great.

Lashley vs. Moose for the Impact Championship: An entertaining match, though I hope I don’t see Moose performing his frightening middle rope moonsault again. This was a strange match to give away without any build. I get the concept was that Lashley and Alberto El Patron would face mystery opponents, but this is the type of match that should be promoted in advance rather than being given away without any notice. This match was bigger than the GFW Title match and would have served as the better main event, but by going with the better match early it did serve as a good hook in terms of the mystery of who El Patron would face. Had they gone with El Patron vs. Adonis first, they may have lost some viewers who would have assumed that Lashley was also going to face an undercard wrestler.

Rosemary vs. Laurel Van Ness for the Knockouts Championship: Rosemary’s new twist on the Undertaker sit-up was very cool. As much as I wanted her to remain heel, she has clicked as a babyface thus far, though I still wonder if the long term plan is for her to eventually turn on her odd couple partner Allie. There’s still a GLOW-like cartoonish feel to the crazy Van Ness character.

Davey Richards vs. Vikas Kumar: A minor Hit for the squash win for Richards. Kumar wasn’t ready for prime time, but the live crowd got behind their fellow countryman. By the way, how does wrestling draw such a cool young crowd in India while the Impact Zone draws, well, Impact Zone dwellers? I assume the crowd consisted mostly of extras, but they also seemed familiar with the product and some of the popular wrestling crowd chants. Anyway, the post match with EC3 whipping the poor rookie wrestler with James Storm eventually running off EC3 was another nice step toward what appears to be a strap match between EC3 and Storm at Slammiversary.

Impact Wrestling Misses

Alberto El Patron vs. Chris Adonis for the GFW Title: A letdown of a main event considering that Lashley faced Moose in a bigger match earlier. It’s frustrating to see Adonis. He showed so much potential early in his career and was probably given too much too soon by WWE. He showed real in-ring improvement and deserved a better fate during his second WWE run. However, it’s been nearly ten years since the company first released him and he hasn’t done anything to reinvent himself. It would be cool if he and the Impact creative came up with something fresh because the Masterlock and everything about his current persona feels tired and dated.

Swoggle and Rockstar Spud: Swoggle beat Spud with a hammer because he pulled his pants down on television. Spud’s character is still a physical wreck. Spud returned the favor by beating Swoggle with a hammer. Swoggle sells nothing and spends his promo time complaining about how he suffered a cut by his eye and had to explain it to his son. The man was hit in the balls with a hammer, yet the small facial cut was his biggest concern. Awful.


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