By Chris Vetter, ProWrestling.net Contributor (@chrisvetter73)
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BodyZoi Wrestling “9”
Replay available via Triller.TV
October 29, 2023 in Faches-Thumesnil, France at Salle Culturelle
This city is on the very north tip of France, straight north of Paris, near the border with Belgium. The show was released last week on Fite+. I recall watching a different episode of Bodyzoi a few months ago that had several U.S. wrestlers. On this show, it features Joey Janela and Mike Bailey. I have seen everyone else on this show five or fewer times. This appears to be a night club and it is PACKED. We have maybe 600 or so fans in here, with fans standing right next to the ring. The fans are totally into this action and this has a real party atmosphere.
* We have a video package, with French commentary, showing highlights from prior shows. A doppelganger of Ian Riccaboni provided ring introductions in French, but we DO have English commentary.
1. Jack Sans-Nom defeated Mike D’Vecchio and Paul Robinson in a three-way to retain the Hardcore Title at 9:32. Mike D is muscular, has a tattoo that covers his back, and short dark hair, and I’ll compare him to NXT’s Joe Coffey. Paul is bald and extremely thin and clearly the heel; think a smaller Justin Credible. Jack, who has long black hair (think a very young TNA-era Chris Harris), pushed a shopping cart filled with weapons to the ring; he wore a T-shirt that read “B Z F’n W” that is definitely copying an ECW shirt. They whacked each other with chairs and weapons; not my style of action but the crowd was into it. Mike D hit a double chokeslam at 7:00. Jack hit a spinebuster for a nearfall. Mke D hit an impressive gut-wrench powerbomb. However, Jack fired a weapon that shot a fireball (yes a literal fireball) into Mike D’s eyes, and he scored the pin.
* In a video, Jimmy Lloyd appeared on a screen and he vowed he is coming Nov. 25 to take Jack’s hardcore title.
2. Danny Black and Joe Lando defeated Daniel Sparks and Tibo Hendrik to win the Tag Team titles at 14:00 even. Lando is a short redhead; he did a tour in the U.S. last year, so I’ve seen more of his matches than anyone else on this show (aside from Bailey and Janela, of course.) Sparks and Hendrick are taller and wore identical jackets; Tibo is Black; Sparks is white. They immediately brawled to the floor. In the ring, the tag champs worked over Lando in their corner. Lando hit a springboard moonsault to the floor onto the heels at 11:00. In the ring, Lando hit a Lionsault for a nearfall. Black and Lando hit a team powerbomb move for a nearfall, but a heel manager pulled the ref from the ring. Lando hit a top-rope Shooting Star Press for the pin! New champions!
* After the match, Sparks shoved TIbo and their Black manager and left the ring alone.
3. Aigle Blanc defeated Mike Bailey at 20:34. Needless to say, this is the match I tuned in for. Blanc wears a gold mask but he’s white with curly blond hair (think Matt Riddle in a lucha mask.) They shook hands and traded standing switches and had a standoff at 1:30. Blanc dropped him with a shoulder tackle and a deep armdrag. They traded kicks to the thighs. Blanc hit a Mafia Kick that sent Bailey to the floor at 4:00, so Blanc hit a flip dive to the floor on Mike. They brawled on the floor. Blanc slammed Bailey on the ring apron. Bailey dropped hm stomach-first on the top rope, then hit a top-rope kneedrop tot he back at 7:00.
Bailey hit a double kneedrop to the chest for a nearfall. He hit a series of kicks and a running Shooting Star Press for a nearfall at 9:00. Blanc hit a flying double knees to the back of the head, then a springboard crossbody block and an enzuigiri, then a twisting neckbreaker for a nearfall. Bailey set up for the Flamingo Driver but Blanc blocked it. So, Bailey nailed a Frankensteiner, then a moonsault kneedrop for a nearfall at 11:30. Blanc hit a Dragon Suplex; Bailey hit a Dragon Suplex; Blanc hit a running knee to the back of the head, and they were both down, and the crowd chanted, “Fight forever!”
They got up and traded chops. They traded kicks to the face. Bailey hit his Speedball kicks at 14:00, and the crowd chanted, in English, “This is awesome!” Bailey nailed the Triangle Moonsault to the floor. They traded blows on the ring apron, with Bailey blocking a Dragon Suplex. However, Bailey missed a moonsault kneedrop and crashed onto the apron. Blanc immediately hit a pair of DDTs onto the ring apron, then a top-rope 450 Splash for a believable nearfall at 17:30. Bailey fired back with his mid-ring Spanish Fly for a nearfall. Blanc mouse-trapped the arms and got a seatbelt rollup for a believable nearfall.
Bailey nailed the Ultima Weapon summersault kneedrop for a believable nearfall at 19:30. Bailey got Blanc up for the Flamingo Driver, but Blanc escaped and they traded rollups. Blanc nailed a tombstone piledriver, and they traded rollup attempts. Blanc nailed a hard clothesline, then a second tombstone piledriver! He hit a Desert Eagle/pumphandle powerbomb for the clean pin. That was fantastic. Bailey went to leave, but Blanc pulled him back into the ring, and they shook hands and bowed on the ring. “One of the greatest matches in the history of BodyZoi Wrestling,” the commentator proclaimed. “Everyone is standing!”
4. Senza Volto defeated Yuval Goldshmit at 14:44. Volto wore a mask and he has a big frame. Yuval has his long hair tied back in a bun, and reminds me a bit of Pete Dunne. Volto hit a handspring-back-elbow at 5:30 and they were both down. Volto hit a Lethal Injection, then a Code Red for a nearfall at 8:00. He hit a mid-ring Spanish Fly, then a top-rope moonsault for a nearfall at 10:30. Volto hit a top-rope huracanrana; it didn’t look great but Yuval sold it well. Yuval fired back with a Frankensteiner and a forward Finlay Roll, then a Phoenix Splash for a nearfall at 13:00. Yuval went for a Shooting Star Press, but Volto got his knees up. Volto then hit a stunner for the pin.
5. Jacob Vadocq defeated Dominique le Talender, Tristan Archer, Ultima Sombra, and Vaughn Vertigo in a five-way at 10:38. Jacob is the Amish man with a straw hat. Dominique is like a shorter, heavier, older WWE Dominik (and a bit like Pacific Northwest star Guillermo Rosas.) Tristan is similar to JD McDonough. Vertigo has shoulder length hair and red-tinted sunglasses; think heel Adam Cole; he looks a lot like Grizzled Young Veteran James Drake. Sombra wore a black outfit and a red-and-black lucha mask. Way too much stalling as we get started. Sombra hit a top-rope dive onto the floor on everyone at 5:30.
Vertigo hit a Tornado DDT and a German Suplex. Sombra hit a spear. Archer hit a standing powerbomb on Sombra. Sombra hit a fadeaway stunner at 9:30. Archer hit a Lungblower. Jacob hit a Rocker Dropper legdrop on Dominique, then a top-rope elbowdrop to pin Dominique. Okay match; everything else here was better. Archer looked the best here, and I didn’t come away with a good impression of Dominique.
* A really entertaining cinematic video of MBM driving through France in a fancy car, praying in church, but also training with weapons to fight Joey Janela. He has placed Janela’s picture on a mannequin to beat itup. MBM has similar height, similar hair style, of Janela.
6. Joey Janela defeated MBM to retain the BodyZoi Title at 27:55. MBM hit a Code Red just seconds into the match. Janela hit a Death Valley Driver onto the ring apron. He choked MBM in the ropes at 2:30. MBM’s shirt was torn off; even his gut is like Janela’s — neither really fat but not exactly a six-pack, either. They traded chops, and MBM hit a DDT at 8:00 and they were both down. Joey hit a top-rope superplex. Joey hit a stunner and a superkick at 10:00, then a standing powerbomb for a nearfall. Joey went under the ring and got a thin board and chairs; any adult would break this thin board if placed on it.
They hit simultaneous clotheslines and were both down at 14:30. Joey hit a German Suplex, then a Dragon Suplex. He hit a Death Valley Driver onto an open chair at 16:30. MBM applied a crossface, and the crowd taunted Joey to tap out. Joey hit a Package Piledriver for a believable nearfall at 18:30. MBM got a barbed-wire board from under the ring. Joey planted cooking skewers in the top of MBK’s head, then he hit a release Razor’s Edge through the barbed wire board for a nearfall at 21:30. This has crossed a line into being too gross for me. MBM hit his own package piledriver for a nearfall. Joey got a chair and hit MBM over the back, then a blow to the face (MBM got his hands up to partially block it.) A ladder was brought into the ring. Joey kicked at MBM’s forehead. He nailed a Burning Hammer onto an open chair for the pin.
Final Thoughts: Bailey-Blanc is far and away the best match of the show. Senza-Yuval earned second place. The main event was a bit too long and a bit too hardcore for my tastes; Janela has a very pace to his matches. There were some other standouts here, from Tristan Archer to Mike D’Vecchio to Joe Lando.
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