06/22 Pruett's Weekly Power Rankings: Will Pruett uses his biased eye and tremendous discernment to break down the top ten wrestlers in WWE, TNA, ROH, PWG... hell, the entire industry
By Will Pruett
These rankings are scientifically calculated by the Rank-o-matic 4000 and verified by four out of five top scientists in the wrestling arts. They are to be taken solemnly and with absolute seriousness.
1. Roman Reigns. WWE's star for a new generation is picking up steam really nicely. On Monday night, he won a Battle Royal, which he gained entry to by drugging Stephanie McMahon. We now know what he keeps in the approximately 173 pockets on his ring gear: drugs. He can make you sleep, vomit, or anything in between. Hopefully never his pills/fluids mixed up. Way to roofie, Roman. Also, let the countdown for the vocal male fans turning on Reigns because he "isn't ready" and "hasn't paid his dues" begin. Just like John Cena in 2004, Reigns will not be the popular new choice of the people for long.
2. Adam Cole (bay-bay). Ring of Honor is making their live pay-per-view debut with Best in the World tonight. Cole has been a fantastically consistent performer for ROH and has grown exponentially as a character. He is well within his stride as champion and should be a long time. While I understand why ROH would want a babyface standing tall at the end of this major show, they don't have the right babyface to do so. Cole has been awesome and should continue to be awesome as ROH World Champion.
3. The Steel Stairs. Now that John Cena has leveled up and learned the "throw" maneuver, the steel stairs are experiencing a career resurgence. They went through a rough patch where their usage seemed trite and TNA basically eliminated them, but Cena has lead the charge and brought the stairs back with brutal force (flying straight at your head).
4. Lashley. In a random moment on Impact, Bobby Lashley, "The Finger-Pointing Pain Machine," won the TNA World Championship via some semi-shady, but not exceptionally shady tactics. The TNA World Championship lineage, since A.J. Styles lost it, reads like a random list of wrestlers around #150 on the PWI 500. Lashley is the latest wrestler to win this illustrious championship. I'm not sure how I feel about it, but I am sure it happened.
5. Seth Rollins. With new super-villain ring gear, Rollins actually looks fantastic. He continues to impress me on the mic (aside from one bad promo on Main Event) and he continues to shine in the ring. Seth Rollins wasn't the "natural choice" for this heel turn, but that is making his post-turn world that much better. Hopefully Rollins keeps this momentum going through Money in the Bank and continues to tell a compelling story well into the fall.
6. Dean Ambrose. Despite constantly losing because he is easily distracted, Ambrose is breaking out of his shell as a fun and dangerous babyface character. Dean can take a simple promo about face rearrangement and make it dynamic. His mannerisms ensure visual interest. He is an unconventional babyface, but he is the type of unconventional babyface WWE has been sorely lacking since that one guy left in January.
7. The Wolves. I don't quite understand how they fit into the heel-MVP story (perhaps watching more than 20 minutes of Impact per week would help, but that's a sacrifice I cannot make) and I'm not sure they NEED to be Tag Team Champions right now, but they sure do have fluffy vests. Fluffy matters. You guys ever wonder if Davey Richards wishes he would have "gone home" when he was told to at that NXT show?
8. Every woman in WWE but Paige. For some reason, WWE is interested in telling every possible story other than the obvious and really great one surrounding their Diva's Champion, Paige. They are breaking up Cameron and Naomi, letting Alicia Fox go crazy, and punishing Nikki Bella, but they are definitely not allowing fans to get behind Paige. It's a weird promotional strategy.
9. Sophomores. With a major vomit gag (somehow involving a cannon) taking place on Monday night, WWE has reverted back to (if you believe they ever stopped) catering to those with sophomoric senses of humor. At the age of 15, I may have giggled watching Stephanie McMahon suffer at the hands of "Roofie" Reigns, but at 26 (still well below the median age of WWE's audience) I was disgusted. Good for sophomores, bad for everyone else.
10. The Bound for Glory Series. I was one of the few who saw some really great potential in the Bound for Glory Series, but I am outnumbered by people who found it confusing (math is hard), too difficult to book (math is really hard), and those who never found the full story-telling potential within the format. Alas, TNA would normally be starting the series around this time of year, but we must pour a memorial 40 on the curb for this fallen homie.
Just missing the cut: Kyle O'Reilly, Bobby Fish, Daniel Bryan, Sheamus, Cesaro, Bray Wyatt, the gold thing holding the two World Title belts, Stephanie McMahon (the non-roofied version), Brie Bella, and El Torito.
Nowhere near this list: Stretchers, JTG, MVP, Michael Elgin's bald head, weird A.J. Lee rumors, and B-Boy.
Will Pruett writes about wrestling in a facetious and often humorous way. Feel free to email him at firstname.lastname@example.org or to follow him and interact on twitter @itswilltime.
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